


How your life changed me

by AbbiNeedless



Category: RuPaul's Drag Race RPF
Genre: Abuse, Bullying, F/F, F/M, Lesbian Character, Physical Abuse, Religious Conflict
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-11
Updated: 2019-10-06
Packaged: 2019-11-15 08:23:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 26,231
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18069938
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AbbiNeedless/pseuds/AbbiNeedless
Summary: Bianca's life was fucked up, at least that was what she thought while on the other side of the country was a young singer who everyone thought had a dream life, how wrong they were.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! I'm back with my favorite lesbians!  
> After a little chat with you on Tumblr I decided that it's time for me to post this spin-off of "Your life is gonna change me" (This is the link to it if you havne't read it :) https://archiveofourown.org/works/13424421/chapters/30764085), first of all; we will discuss some serious topics here, all the things they went through and all that happened before Adore and Bianca met each other, I'll try to put warnings before each chapter.  
> Second, right now I'm studying college and working so my updates is going to be slow, but there are going to be new chapters, that's a fact.  
> Three... I don't really have a number three, just to tell you that I missed y'all and I hope you like this ❤️  
> Remember you can find me as IADOREYOUBABYDOLL or little bitty baby Potter in Tumblr!

“Please… Please pick up…”  
_“… Hello, who’s this?”_  
“Thank God you picked up, Dela. It’s Bianca.”  
_“Bianca, hi!” Her friend said in the other line. “Merry Christmas!”_  
“It’s not that Merry anymore, do you still have that spare room you were renting?”  
_“I do, why do you ask, Bea?”_  
“It’s a long story.”  
_“We have time.”_  
“But it’s Christmas, you and your dad must be celebrating, aren’t you?”  
_“After a few drinks my dad fell asleep and Gus already went home, we have all the time of the world, tell me what happened.”_  
“Ok, I'll tell you.”  


_December 26th, 1993_  


Bianca took her blankets and her pillow into a plastic bag and placed it next to her door, she looked at the framed pictures on her walls and started to put them on her bed, she heard her door open and saw her brother enter with more boxes.  


“Thank you, Tony.” Bianca took the boxes from her brother and started putting her clothes on them, she folded every single piece of clothing and was placing them in the box by color.  
“Bianca, are you ok?”  
“I’m good, Tony.” She told her brother. “I’m amazing, I’m perfect, I’m fucking great.” Bianca threw her red dress on the box and opened another one. “I just have to do this quick before mom comes back, she wants me out before dinner.”  


Her brother didn’t say a word, instead he took a box and put her fabric and all the sewing items she had, he also put her sewing machine on it.  


“Thanks, man.”  
“Don’t thank me.”  
“Where are the kids?”  
“At grandma’s, mom doesn’t want them to see you leaving.”  
“Nice from her.”  


While her brother took the first boxes to his truck Bianca continued putting her belongings in boxes, she was not going to admit this to anyone but she was on the verge of tears. Every item that went into a box felt like a stab to her heart.  


She was really going to miss this house, she had lived there for 18 years, she had lived happy and sad moments, fun moments, angry moments but she wouldn’t change it for anything. This is her home.  


No.  


This used to be her home.  


She opened one last box and started putting the things from her bookcase in it.  


This was the hardest part, every single thing of this bookcase had a memory with it.  


“This teddy bear…”  


_“Papa, look!” She was younger, she remembered. “Do you think you can win it for me? Pleaseee?”_  
_“I think I can.” Her dad put a coin in the prizes machine and started moving the claw. “Tony, Bea, look at this. If you swing the claw to right and left a lot of times it’s easier to get the teddy bear Bea wants._ ”  
_“It will fall.” Her sister had said._  
_“That’s the point, Lucy.” When he caught the bear and the claw wobbled to the left it made the bear fall in the right place. “Told you!”_  
_“You got it!” David screamed._  
_“Here you have, Bea.” Bianca took the teddy bear from her dad’s hands and wrapped her arms around his neck._  
_“Thank you, papa.”_  
_“You’re welcome, mi niña.” He kissed her forehead and went back to the machine. “Now let’s get one for all of you. Which one do you want, Tony?”_  


_They left that fair with multiple stuffed animals and big smiles that day._  


But those times were over.  


She was almost done when she heard her door open and saw her parents standing in there.  


“I-“ The box and a framed picture she had on her hands fell, the frame shattered and the floor was full of broken glass. She immediately kneeled and took the broken pieces. “Sorry! I’ll clean it ip before I leave.”  


Her mom shook her head and left without saying a word.  


“Let me give you a hand.” Her dad said, he put all the things that had fell from her box back on it.  
“Sorry.”  
“You don’t have to be sorry, Bea.” He smiled at the teddy bear and put it on the box.  
“It’s just… What if mom is right? I feel like I don-shit.”  
“What?”  
“I’m fine, I just cut my hand with the glass.”  
“Leave that on the floor, I’ll clean it.” He got up and took her to the bathroom, Bianca sat on the toilet while her dad took out the first aid kit from her drawer. “Give me your hand.”  
“I said I’m fine.”  
“And I said give me your hand, Bianca.”  


She did was she was told to do, her dad cleaned the cut and bandaged her hand.  


“Here you go.”  
“Thank you.” She saw her dad take all the things from the bathroom drawer and put them in a bag and then the box. “What are you doing?”  
“You will need those.”  
“Oh.”  
“Yeah.” He took the photo from the frame that had been broken and sadly smiled to it. “I remember this day.”  
“You do?” She sat next to him in the floor.  
“Yes.” He ran his thumb across the picture. “You played Mrs…”  
“Mrs. Pots.”  
“Mrs. Pots.” He smiled. “You were so sad because you thought we were not going and then we showed up right before it started it.”  
“It was a nice surprise.” She rested her head on her dad’s shoulder.  
“Yes…” He gave her the photo, Bianca folded it and put it on her wallet.  


They remained sat on the floor holding each other for a while, her dad never let go of her hand.  


After a few more minutes he took out his wallet and handed her a card.  


“I already transferred you all the money I had saved for college.”  
“You didn’t have to do that.”  
“Don’t talk bullshit, that money was meant for you to use it.” He kissed her temple. “Where are you going to stay?”  
“There is a girl from my class that told me her dad is renting a room in their house, I’m going to live with them.”  
“I don’t think you’ll like that.”  
“That’s the only thing I’m going to be able to afford, dad.”  
“I know, I know. Sorry.”  


Her dad got up and took the bookcase on his hands.  
“Come on, take the box, we have to take your things to the truck.”  


She followed her dad and put all the things in the back of the truck, while he went back inside to get her mattress she started to get lost on her thoughts.  


“Bianca.”  


She turned around and saw her mom standing in front of her, she looked tired and angry from last night, her eyes were emotionless.  


“Mom.”  


Her mom pointed at her wrist where she was wearing her ojo de venado.  


“Give it to me.”  


Bianca pressed her lips on a thin line but nodded, she undid the red ribbon and gave it back to her mother, she took it and walked back to the house.  


Bianca couldn’t believe this was happening yet, she felt a knot on her throat and held back the tears, she was not going to give her mom the satisfaction of her crying.  


Bianca sat on the truck and saw her dad placing her mattress on the front door as he saw his wife entering the house with her ojo de venado on her hand, he walked back in and closed the door.  


She was grateful her dad was helping her to move but she couldn’t understand why he wasn’t doing anything for her to stay. She was only 18, you’re not supposed to leave your parents’ house when you’re this young, this was not right.  


“Hey, are you ok?” Her brother’s voice took her off guard.  
“Yes, I’m good.” She wiped her nose and helped him to get the mattress in the truck. “Where’s dad?”  
“Inside fighting with mom, he told me to take you to your new house. Do you have the address?”  
“I do.” She got down and entered the truck. “Why are you taking me? Wasn’t dad supposed to-“  
“I already told you that he is fighting with mom, don’t ask more questions and tell me how to get there.” He turned on the engine.  
“But dad…”  
“Bianca, just tell me how to get there, please.”  


Bianca gave him the paper where she had written Dela’s direction, her brother started driving and, as they drove away, Bianca gave one last glance to the placed that used be her home.  


She wanted the tears to come but they didn’t.  


And Bianca didn’t understand why.

\----  


“Is it here?”  
“I think it is.”  
“Haven’t you been here before?” Her brother asked her.  
“Not really.” She said. “If we had homework or something we’d go to Raja’s.”  


They parked outside of a white house; the garden was full of flowers and had a lot of ornaments, there was a guy sitting on the stairs, when he saw the park he got up and it seemed he was calling someone from inside, the house’s door opened and a chubby, black-haired girl waved to her.  


“Hi, Bianca!”  
“Hi, Dela.”  


Dela ran to her and squeezed her in a tight and loving hug.  


“I’m so sorry for what happened with your family.” She put the loosen hairs from Bianca’s ponytail behind her ear. “No parent has the right to do what they did.”  
“I know.” Bianca’s voice was emotionless, she couldn’t really tell why and she didn’t want it come the way it did but Dela didn’t seem to care.  
“Oh, Bea.” She enveloped her in another hug. “Everything is going to be ok.”  
“Thank you.” She looked at her brother who seemed to be uncomfortable. “He is my brother, Tony.”  
“Hi!” Without stopping holding Bianca’s hand Dela greeted him. “Delilah, Dela for shorter and Lila for my dad.”  
“Nice to meet you, Dela.”  
“Nice to meet you too, Tony.” Dela waved to the door and two guys joined them. “This is my dad, Ben and this is Gus, my boyfriend.”  
“Hi.”  
“Hello.” Dela’s dad looked at Bianca. “Lila just told me you’re moving with us today, right?”  
“That’s right, sir.”  
“Before we take you in and your stuff from the truck would you mind have a word with me?”  
“I…” Dela smiled and nodded to her. ‘It’s gonna be ok.’ “Sure.”  


Bianca followed Dela’s dad inside of the house, he told her to sit in the sofa and got her a cup of coffee.  


“Thank you, sir.”  
“Don’t thank me.” He took a sip from his cup and placed on the side table. “So, before you fully move with us I need to ask you some things, are you ok with that?”  
“I am.”  
“Ok.” He leaned on his armchair and looked straight to her. “First question and I have to ask it anyways, even though Lila already explained it to me I want to hear it from you.”  
“I’m listening.”  
“Why moving the very next day after Christmas?”  
“Well… I revealed a secret to my family, something they don’t approve and my mom went crazy.” She said. “She lost her mind and told me she wanted me out by tomorrow, today and here I am.”  
“What was this thing that you revealed to her?”  
“…”  
“Bianca, here we won’t judge, my wife wouldn’t forgive me for that.” He looked at the picture of a woman that was hanging on the wall. She looked exactly like Dela except for the hair, the woman had brown hair and Dela’s was black. “She always taught us to be loving and accepting and now that she is gone is not like it’s going to change.”  


Bianca looked at the floor and took a long breath.  
“I like girls, sir.”  
“That’s all? Ok, next question.”  
Bianca looked at her surprised, he didn’t even give her a disgust look or sound.  
“What?”  
“Sorry, it’s just that… I’m not used to people not minding this.”  
“Being gay is not a bad thing, Bianca.” He said.  
“But the Bible and the pastor say that it is.”  
“I don’t want to offend you or your beliefs but the church don’t know what they are talking about. They’re just scared of what they don’t understand, don’t blame yourself for their ignorance.”  


Bianca was shocked, she had never heard someone talk like this about her faith.  
“I…”  
“Let’s move to the next question and this is the most important question.” He rested his elbows on his knees and looked straight at her. “Do you like dogs?”  
“What?”  
“Do you like dogs?” He repeated.  
“I do but my mom never let us have one.”  
“That changes today.” He got up and after a few seconds he returned with a big dog that immediately jumped to her and licked her face. “Meet Marshmallow, Marsh for shorter.”  
“He is cute.” Bianca laughed and petted its head. “Hello, baby!” Marsh rested his head on her lap and Bianca felt his kisses on her hand. “What a good boy!”  
“Perfect, that’s all I wanted to know.” He walked to the door. “We’ll get your stuff to your new room.”  
“Ok.”  
“Delilah!”  
“Yes, dad?” She immediately peeked her head through the door.  
“Please show Bianca her room, me, Gus and…”  
“Antwan but call him Tony.” Bianca told him.  
“Antwan will bring her belongings.”  
“Sure, dad!” She joined them and took Bianca’s hand. “You’ll love it.”  


They climbed the stairs with Marsh behind them, Dela took a key from her pocket and opened a white door.  


The room was big, it was bigger than her room at her parents’ house, it had a big closet with a mirror attached on the inside and a big window in the left wall from where she could see a church and a park.  


“Marsh likes to go to that park, you can take him whenever you want.” Dela said.  
“Really?”  
“Yes, he loves it.”  


When Tony placed the first boxes on the floor Dela immediately started helping Bianca to put everything in order, Bianca passed her the last item from the first box and went for the second.  


“Wait.” Dela said and looked for something in one of the bottom drawers of the closet.  
“What?”  
“Sit on that chair.”  


She sat as Dela told her to, Marsh rested his head on her lap again.  


“What do you think of your new room?” Dela asked her.  
“It’s cute.”  
“It’ll look cuter once you make it your own.”  
“What do you mean?”  
“You can decorate it like you want.” She said. “You can hang pictures or your designs if you want, posters too or whatever you want, my dad won’t mind.”  
“Are you sure?”  
“Of course.” Dela approached to her with a tissue and lotion. “You don’t know it but you have trails of make-up under your eyes and cheeks.”  
“Fuck… I must look horrible.”  
“I don’t want to say horrible, let’s just say that you don’t look particularly good.” She wiped the rest of Bianca’s make-up.  
“I don’t feel good either, it matches.”  


Dela sighed and throw the tissue to the trash can.  


“You’ll feel better, you’ll see.”  
“I want to believe that.”  
“You will.” Dela wrapped her arms around her and Marsh rested his head on her lap. “My mom always said that after the storm the rainbow always comes.”  
“My mom said that the gays profaned the rainbow.” She felt her eyes watering, Dela tight her embrace. “Why did I have to tell her, Dela? I made her angry, I embarrassed my whole family.”  
“Nothing of this is your fault, you know?”  
“It feels like it is.”  
“But is not.” She smiled to her. “If she believes that… Sorry but she is been stupid.”  
“She told me no one will ever love me.”  
“She is wrong, she doesn’t even know how wrong she is.” Dela gave her a tissue. “All people have the love of her life somewhere and you won’t be the exception.”  
“I want to believe you.”  
“You will.”  


\----  


“This is the last box.” Gus said. “You girls need anything else?”  
“No, baby.” Dela told him. “I’ll help her to unbox the rest of her things and I’ll see you tomorrow, ok?”  
“Ok.” He gave her a peck. “See you, my love.”  
“See you.”  
“And see you, Bianca, it was nice to meet you.”  
“Same.” She looked at her brother who helped her to put her bookcase in place. “Thanks, man.”  
“…”  
“…”  


Dela seemed to understand that Tony wanted to talk alone with Bianca, she got up and walked to the door.  


“I think I’ll make dinner, hope you like casseroles because I’m cooking a chicken casserole with a lot of carrots and cabbages.”  
“Thank you, Dela.”  


She left the two of them accompanied by Marsh.  


“So this is goodbye, Bea.”  
“It doesn’t have to be a goodbye.”  
“No, it has to.”  
“Tony…”  
“It’s difficult for me…”  
“Really?” Bianca didn’t meant to yell to her brother but she had had enough. “You act like this is too hard for you and that’s fucking stupid! 

You are not the one who is being forced to leave!”  


“Bea…”  
“You are not the one who had to listened to mom all night try to pray the gay away from you!”  
“Bea, please…”  
“You are not the one who has to leave!”  
“Bianca, stop being this fucking selfish! Not everything has to be about yourself!”  
“Excuse me?”  
“You act like you are the victim in this, you are the one who chose this path! You just wanted their attention!”  
“Don’t talk about something you don't understand, Antwan! Being gay is not something you choose, you are born this way and what the fuck do you mean?”  
“Everything has always to be about yourself, you don’t even know a shit about what is going on with the rest of us!” He yelled. “I just got a scholarship and a year in Cambridge but guess what, my sister being a fucking dyke is more important than having a Cambridge scholarship!”  
“I didn’t mean to do it, Tony.”  
“Bullshit.”  
“But that doesn’t give you the right to call me that.”  
“I’m going to call you the way I want!” He said. “But you know, you could have changed this if you wanted, if you started dating guys this would have changed. Maybe if you had some man in your bed you wouldn’t have turn out this way.”  


This was it, this was why she hadn’t had told them before.  


“You…” She punched him against the wall. “I told you to not talk about something you don’t understand, you don’t know a shit about this, you fucking piece of trash!”  
“Don’t punch me, stupid dyke!”  


Tony grabbed her arms and pushed her away, Bianca fell hard on the floor and hit her head on the corner of the bed. Marsh immediately jumped to Tony and made him fall as well, he was barking to him and wasn’t letting him go.  


The door opened and both Dela and her dad were in the room.  


“Marsh, stop!” Dela’s dad took the dog away from her brother and Dela helped her to get up.  
“Bea, you’re bleeding.” Bianca touched where her head had hit the bed and found a blood stain on her fingers.  
“Jesus…”  
“Antwan.” He was talking to her brother. “Under no circumstances a man is allowed to hit a woman, no one is ever allowed to even put a finger on a woman.”  
“She is my sister and she is an ungrateful brat!”  
“Leave my house, Antwan.” He said. “Leave, now.”  
“I leave when I want to leave, not when you tell me to.”  
“Leave or I will call the police.” Dela said with the most emotionless voice Bianca had ever heard her talk. “I will send you to jail if you don’t leave our home now.”  


Tony looked at her startrucked, he looked away and took his keys.  


“I hope I won’t see you ever again.” He told Bianca.  
“Finally we agree on something.” She said looking into his eyes.  


He left the room followed by Dela’s dad and Bianca felt her heart break into a million pieces.  


She was so tired of feeling this way, she wanted to feel numb, that's all she wanted.  
“No one will hurt you again, Bea.” Dela said. “I promise.”  
“You’re right.” She said with a cold voice. “No one will ever, I‘m not letting anyone in again.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi you! I have a little chapter for today, it's little, I know but I think it will be a nice connection with what is to come  
> Eat breakfast, drink water and work hard everyday!

"Bianca?" Dela opened the door and saw Bianca tangled on her blankets laying on the bed, the boxes they let on the floor remained taped, it seemed that after the incident with Tony she had just laid down all night and did nothing. "Breakfast is ready."  
"I'm not hungry." Bianca's voice was more of a whisper than her normal loud voice.  
"Bianca, you didn't eat anything last night, you need to eat something."  
"Dela, I'm not hungry I just…" Bianca covered her head with the blanket. "I need to be alone."  


Dela sighed but did what Bianca asked her, before she left the room she placed a cup of coffee and a cookie on her nightstand.  
Bianca heard the door close, she turned around and reached for the cup, she sat down and took a sip.  


"She didn't use sugar." She took another sip. "So good." She took the cookie and took a big bite. "This is good."  
_"You're welcome!"_  


Bianca shook her head, she was not going to say thanks you to Dela.  


But she was thankful for her friend.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Y'ALL! IM SO SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG  
> It's the end of the semester and I'm going crazyyyy BUT I had enough free time to finish this chapter.  
> Now I let you read this and I'll be back to work on my Translation final project  
> Deuces!

Bianca turned around, she looked at the ceiling and took a long breath, her stomach was grateful she had had something to eat, she felt better.  
It was time to get up from the bed, it had been enough time on just laying there.  


She got up and saw her taped boxes, she picked one to open it up and the first thing she saw was a picture of her holding Claudia as a newborn baby and her mom in the background smiling while holding her as she held her sister.  


The feeling came back to her, the urge to throw up and the emptiness on her chest.  


"Mom… You're a fucking liar!" She ripped the photo into pieces and threw it through the window. "You aren't ready to love me no matter what!" Bianca saw the pieces fly away and sat on the floor against the wall. "Liar, liar… Liar."  


She felt like shit.  


\----  


"Bianca? Bianca open up." Dela tried to open the door of her friend's room but it was locked, she had the key but she didn't want to push her to do anything or to force her to see her. "Come on, Bea, I brought you coffee." She didn't get any response from her, she heard a door open behind her, her dad came out of the bathroom.  
"Still locked inside?"  
"Yes." She whispered and placed the mug on the floor in front of the door, she followed her dad downstairs. "I don't know what to do, she's not coming out of her room, not even to eat."  
"She's mourning, Lila."  
"What do you mean?"  
"Think about it, her family kicked her out, the last time she saw her brother he attacked her, she has younger siblings that don't know the truth of what happened to their big sister, she can't explain them." He took her hands. "She is going to need time but she will also need her friends with her, not right now just give her time."  
"But she doesn't even want to see me or talk to me."  
"Don't stop trying, she will thank you."  


Dela smiled and squeezed her father's hands.  


"Thanks, dad."  


He smiled and kissed her temple.  


"Do something different, maybe some other friend should try to talk to her."  
"That's a good idea, I think I know who will get her out of the bed."  


\----  


Bianca still felt like horrible, she had drank the coffee Dela had left for her and she was still hungry but ignored the feeling of her stomach, she felt like if she ate anything she would throw up.  


She sat on the bed and looked again at her boxes, they were surrounded by the torn photos she had brought with her and yet she didn't feel any better.  


She thought that by ripping apart the memories that hurt her she would feel better but she didn't feel something change, she was feeling numb.  


_"Hey."_ She heard a knock on the door. _"Bitch, it's Raja. Open up, let's have a kiki, I bought Segura Viuda."_  


Bianca looked at the door but didn't move, she was sure Dela had called her.  
_"Bitch, come on."_ She knocked on the door again. " _I already know what happened, I just wanna know you're ok._ "  


Bianca froze on her feet, she didn't want people to know, it was her problem, why Raja knew? No one should know, no one could know.  


"I'm ok, don't worry about it."  
"Bianca, you're not ok, you need to let everything out, come on." She knocked again. "It's almost New Year's Eve, let's prepare something."  


Bianca walked to the door, she saw the door's knob.  


And walked back to her bed.  


"You don't need to worry, I'm ok I just need to sleep it away… You can go back to your mother, I'm sure she's zealous to spend New Year's Eve with her beloved daughter."  
_"... Bea, don't do that."_  
"And stop calling me Bea, I'm Bianca."  


She got under her blanket and hid her face under her pillow.  
Bianca heard her friend knocking on the door for a few more minutes but at the end the knocking stopped, she heard Raja going downstairs and felt the tears forming on her eyes.  
She fought them away and hugged her pillow.  
It didn't feel right.  


\----  


Bianca woke up and looked at the calendar she had hung on the wall.  


_December 31st 1993_  
_New Year's Eve_  


She looked at the ceiling and took a long breath.  


It was like a week since she was kicked out and her stuff was still in the boxes, she hadn't put anything in its place since Dela had helped her, the room even smelled weird, she looked at a big red box where she remembered putting her sewing machine and fabrics, maybe she could sew something and that would make her feel less like shit.  


Bianca got up and kneeled to grab the box but it was not heavy.  


"What the…" She opened it and found nothing. "No… It… It was here!"  


She looked through all her boxes, she took everything out, her clothes, her books, her sketchbooks and found nothing, her sewing machine was gone.  


" No, no, I'm sure I brought it with me!"  
_"Bianca, are you up?"_ She heard Dela's dad calling her from downstairs. " _I know you've been busy but I need a favor and Lila went out with Augustus_."  


Bianca sighed.  


"I'm coming, just… Give me a second."  


She put her hair in a bun, she put on her sandals and a sweater and went downstairs, she found Dela's dad on the kitchen cooking something she was not sure what it was.  


"Oh, there you are." He turned down the flame. "How are you feeling today?"  
"Not good, not bad."  
"You seem stressed." He looked directly at her. "What's the matter? Besides everything."  
"It's just…" She sat on a chair and Marsh went to her running, he rested his head on her lap. "I think my brother stole my sewing machine, I brought it with me and I cannot find it anywhere."  
"Do you really think he did?"  
"He's the only person that I could think of." Marsh climbed to her lap and placed his paws on her shoulders.  
"I'll see if it's around on one of the boxes he left on the living room, don't worry about that."  
"Thank you." She kissed Marsh's head. "What did you need me for?"  
"I need you to go to the market down the park to buy this for our dinner tonight, I was going to send Lila but she left with her boyfriend and hasn't come back yet." He handed her a small list in a piece of paper."  
"Sure."  
"You can take Marsh with you if you want, I haven't walked him today." The dog barked and ran for his leash that was on the couch, Bianca put it on the dog's collar. "Take the money that's next to the door and the keys, the market is a block down the park."  
"Ok."  
"Take the keys as well, keep the change and buy yourself whatever you want."  


She went out of the house and was blinded by the sun, she hadn't been out since the day she arrived and even when her eyes hurt it feel good being outside, it was cold and foggy, she loved it and Marsh seemed to enjoy it as well, stopping everywhere to smell every single thing and running around, thank God the leash was long.  


They walked through the park to cut the way and at the end of the park she saw the market, it was in parking lot and people was doing their shopping with their dogs.  


"Oh, that's why Ben told me to bring you."  


She took a basket from the entry and walked around the stands picking all the things that were on Ben's list.  


Carrots.  
Apples.  
Almonds.  
Blueberries.  
Corriander.  
Corriander?  


"Who the fuck calls cilantro, corriander?" Marsh barked and she laughed. "No one, exactly."  


She paid the lady and looked again at the list, she was only missing eggs, she looked at her right and saw a lady that had a lot of chickens and eggs around her table, Bianca walked to her.  


"Hey, baby Marsh, hi!" Marsh wagged his tail and walked towards the lady. "You're such a handsome boy! And you must be Bianca, right?"  
"Yes but… How do you know my name?"  
"Sometimes Ben and I go out to walk out dogs, he told me about you." The lady looked at her list. "Need 10 eggs, right?"  
"Indeed." The woman smiled at her and started putting the eggs on a plastic bag. "What did he tell you?"  
"He only told me that you were looking for freedom, you have some strict parents and wanted to be in liberty of doing what you wanted so you left your house and came to live with them." She handed her the bag and took the bill from her. "Is that what happened?"  
"I… Yes, sweet freedom."  


The lady smiled and handed Bianca her change.  


"Well, I hope you find what you're looking for." She handed her a cutie and a sausage to Marsh. "Walk home safely!"  


Bianca thanked her and walked to the street with Marsh wagging his tail next to her.  


"She was really nice don't you think?"  
_"Oh my God, isn't that Bianca?"_  


Bianca froze on her feet, she kneeled and hid next to a wall.  
_"I don't think it was her, she looked different and besides I don't think she would go out looking like that_."  
_"Yeah, I haven't seen her in days, what happened to her?"_  
_"I heard her parents had to kick her out._ "  
" _Oh my Goodness, why?"_  
_"Well… come."_  


She didn't stay longer, she ran towards the park and rested her back against a tree, her breathing was fast and she felt her hands sweating.  


"Keep it together, Bianca, come on." Her fingers were cold and started to feel dizzy. "Come on, come on!"  


Marsh seemed to notice she was not feeling well, he climbed to her lap and rested his paws on her shoulders, he licked her face several times until Bianca's breathing stabilized. She wrapped her arms around the dog and let a long breath out.  


"Thank you, baby bear."  


She wiped her eyes and took the bag with everything she had bought.  


"Let's go."  


As she walked back to Dela's house she saw a lady with two little kids, they were talking about their plans to receive the New Year and Bianca started wondering what her family was doing, it was around 11AM so her dad and Tony must be on the backyard cleaning the corn her mom would need later for dinner, the kids must be around putting candles around the house and her mom… Her mom would be making torrejas without her.  


She felt the urge to cry again but fought it back, she was sure her family was not crying over her, her mom wouldn't allow it, she would handle them as she had always done before. Her mom was not driven by emotion and didn't let her kids do it.  
Bianca walked faster to the house, when she opened the door she found no one there.  


"I'm back!" No response. "I got everything you asked on the list." Silent.  


Bianca put the bag on the kitchen counter and opened the backyard's door for Marsh and walked upstairs where she saw the door of her room closed.  


"What? I…" She tried to open it. "I didn't close it before I left." She tried to open the door again but got the same result, the door was locked. "Oh, come on!"  
_"Bianca_!" The door slammed open and Dela come out of the room jumping.  
"AHH! What the fuck is wrong with you, Delilah!?" Bianca held herself from the bars of the stairs. "What were you doing in there? Why is no one downstairs?"  
"We're all in here."  
"What?"  
"You see, I know you hate surprises but…" She closed the door behind her. "I don't care, we got something for you."  
"We?"  
_"Yes and you're gonna love it, bitch_." The door opened and Bianca saw Raja standing in there smirking.  
"This is Raja and this is my fashion reboot of this mess!"  
"What?"  
"You only know how to ask questions with W and H or what?" Raja hugged her and kissed her cheek leaving a bright red mark on it, Bianca let herself enjoy the hug of her friend and rested her head on her shoulder.  
"Sorry for not opening the door and not calling you back, I was feeling like shit."  
"You don't have anything to apologize for or explain yourself, I already know and besides I don't think talking about it it's the best for you."  
"Thanks, bitch." Raja kissed her cheek again and Bianca pushed her away. "Get away, gross!"  
"Hey, we did something for you." Raja took a scarf and covered her eyes, Dela held her hand and got her inside the room.  
"Is this really necessary?"  
"We told you it's a surprise!"  
"And I told you I don't like surprises."  
"You say it like I give a shit, sit your ass down in your bed and shut up."  


They helped her to sit down, she felt that the bed was made and the room didn't smell like old coffee anymore, it smelled like…  


"Is that Fabuloso morado?"  


Her friends burst into laughter with two other people Bianca was more sure who were.  


"Yes it is!" Dela said, Bianca felt her taking her hands. "Before you take the scarf off I want you to know that this is our gift to you."  
"We know you've been through some hard shit." Raja said, she sat next to her and held her. "This is for you to feel better and to begin your new life without feeling horrible, you can take the scarf off."  
Bianca did it and opened her mouth in disbelief, the room was clean, her friends had put everything in order, there was no clothes, trash or boxes on the floor, the close was organized and the walls were decorated with her designs and drawings. The bed had a new blanket and her teddy bear was there next to her pillows.  


"We thought that if we helped you out with your room it would be the first step to start this new life." 

She heard Gus say who had been standing next to the close for a while next to a short Indian lady that Bianca knew well, Danika, Raja's mom.  


"Bianca." Mrs. Gemini walked to her and held her hands on her own. "I want you to know that you're loved and you're gonna be ok."  
"Thank you."  


Danika pressed their foreheads together and kissed her cheek.  


"We got something for you." She said and walked out of the room with Gus, they came back with a sewing machine and a box full of fabrics, Bianca got up impressed and walked to them, she looked at the fabrics and the sewing machine, it was brand new. "This is for you, new beginnings deserve new things, don't you think?"  


Bianca looked at the door where Dela's dad was, he shook his head, she knew what it meant.  


He didn't find her sewing machine.  


"Thank you, for everything."  


Danika hugged her again.  


"One more thing." Raja passed her mom a small green box, Danika handed her to Bianca, she opened and found a simple black shirt with her name on the right. "You're gonna need a job and Raja here thought that you would be a very good addition to our team in Karma Studios, what do you think?"  


Bianca smiled, she put on the shirt and looked at them.  


"I'm in."  


Both women cheered and hugged her, she saw Dela hugging Gus and her dad.  


"Well." Dela's dad said. "I'm making some very good food for us to welcome 1994, are you up for a party or what?"  


Bianca laughed and for the first time in days she felt good, she felt that she could find another family, a family that didn't dismiss her for being who she was. She smiled and looked at him.  


"Sure, why not?"


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oye tú, here you have chapter four! I'm done with finals so let's hope I can get some more chapters while I'm on vacations -w-  
> Enjoy!

"If you sew this by the back you can cover it when you turn around the skirt, like this."  


Bianca cut the string of thread and flipped the skirt, both Raja and Danika were impressed, Raja's mom looked very pleased, she got up and took a closer looked on the skirt.  


"You can barely see the stitches." She took the skirt on her hands. "This is impressive!"  
"Thank you so much!"  
P>Bianca grabbed the next pieces of fabric and started to sew them to make the next skirt, she had to get ten of them done for Saturday's morning, she was happy to see that Raja's mom was happy with her work and she wanted it to remain like this. She continued with the sewing machine of the studio while Raja helped her with the upper parts of the uniforms and her mom attended the counter.  


After five more skirts she heard the studio's door open.  


"Hi! I brought you lunch!"  


It was Dela. Bianca smiled and stopped the machine, she and Raja got up and went out to the counter, Dela was there talking with Danika and smiled when she saw them.  


"Hi there you two! Are you hungry? I brought you some sandwiches and fruit."  
"Thank you." Bianca took a sandwich and gave it a bite, they went to the back of the studio and sat on the floor to eat.  
"So? Ready to go back to school?" Danika asked them. "Is your last semester, do you have something planned after high school?"  
"I want to keep the studio." Raja said. "I think I can run it as it is, I like it."  


Danika nodded.  


"What about you, Dela?"  
"I don't know, I kinda want to study something related to medicine, maybe a doctor or a nurse."  
"Oh, that sounds lovely! I'm sure you are going to be the best." Danika looked at Bianca. "What about you, Bianca? Got something?"  


Bianca looked at the sandwich on her hand, then to the sewing machine and shook her head.  


"I used to have an idea of what I was going to do but now I'm not sure."  
"Do you want to tell us?"  
"... Not really."  
"That's okay." Danika placed her hand on her leg and squeezed it. "You don't need to tell." They heard the door of the studio open.  
"Don't, I got it mom." Raja let her sandwich on the chair and went to the counter while the girls finished eating, Dela and Raja's mom were talking about something that Bianca was not really interested in, she finished her sandwich and went back to the machine, she continued her work with the skirts but couldn't put all of her attention on them, Danika's question remained on her head.  
"Do you have something planned after high school?"  


She didn't, not anymore, her mom was going to send her to a Catholic university to study the Bible and become a pastor but now after everything she didn't have a clear path, she was not sure of what she was going to do.  


It sucked.  


She stayed until late to finish the uniforms, Danika have her the keys to close when she was done, she walked by herself all the way to Dela's house still asking herself what was she going to do now.  


She didn't know.  


\----  


_"Who's a good boy? Who's the goodest boy? You, Marsh! You are!"_  
"Bianca, come on. We're going to be late!"  
"I'm coming!"  


Bianca kissed the top of Marsh's head and got on Raja's car, today she was driving them to school for their last first day.  


"What was taking you so long? Jesuschrist." Raja asked her as she turned on her mom's car and drove away the avenue.  
"A gorgeous and good boy that wanted to say bye before I left."  
"You know she does that every day before she leaves to work?" Dela whispered to Raja who burst into laughter.  
"Really? The Bianca del Rio melts for a dog?"  
"Dogs are pure souls full of light and they're the only people that deserve my whole heart and love."  
"What about me?" Raja asked her and made her best impression of puppy eyes but she only got a smirk from her.  
"You're not worthy."  
"And me?" Dela asked her and pinched her own cheek.  
"... Meh, fifty fifty."  


They laughed and kept driving through the town, Dela opened the glove compartment and grabbed a casette that was laying in there, after a few seconds of struggling Dela turned on the radio and the sound of Nirvana filled the car.  


_She eyes me like a Pisces when I am weak_  
_I've been locked inside your heart-shaped box for weeks_  
_I've been drawn into your magnetar pit trap trap_  
_I wish I could eat your cancer when you turn black_  


They sang along the lyrics, Raja tapped the rhythm with her fingers on the wheel while Bianca and Dela sang along the lyrics, she enjoyed those little moments with her friends, she hadn't had so many of them before and was determined to treasure as many as she could. After a few more songs they arrived to the school, Raja turned off the radio and helped her to get out from the back seat.  


"Come on, loser. We got shit to do."  


Gus was waiting for them on the door, he took Dela's hand while Raja wrapped her arms around Bianca's shoulder, they entered the school and Bianca immediately felt the change, she felt how everyone's eyes were on her since the moment they entered the building.  


"Raja…"  
"What?"  
"Is it me or everyone is staring at us?"  


Raja looked around briefly.  
"You crazy, come on." She walked faster. "We gotta go to Mrs. Davenport class, I don't think you want to get in troubles with her on our last semester."  
"Sure, just let me go to my locker for my book."  
"I'll go with you."  


Both girls walked to her locker, as she opened it and grabbed her stuff she could hear whispers behind her, she looked where the whispering was coming and saw two freshman girls looking at her.  


"Take a picture, it lasts longer." She said and closed her locker with a slam. "Stop bitching around and go to your fucking classes, now."  


Both girls ran away and Bianca gave a long breath.  


It was going to be a long and exhausting semester and she was not wrong, the stares continued, people would be talking about her on her back and they started to spread rumors about her.  


_“I heard she tried to seduce a girl from her congregation_.”  
_“And I heard that she was dating an older woman that turned her into that."_  


She would ignore all of this but it was hard, she had her friends with her but sometimes it felt like it was not enough.  


Bianca was walking with Raja to her class when she realized she was missing something.  


“Wait, I need to get my book.”  
"Again?"  
"I forgot it, sorry!"  


They walked to Bianca’s locker where a lot of people were crowded.  


“What are you doing?” Bianca asked them, all of them looked down at her, some of them were whispering. “What? Do I have something on my face? Get out of my way.”  


When she finally reached her locker she understood why, someone had spray painted on it.  


DIE  
NO ONE WANTS YOU HERE  
DYKE  
DISGUSTING BITCH  


“Get out of my… Shit.” She heard Raja who was now standing next to her.  
“Why are so many people here?” She heard Dela’s voice. “Gus, do you see Bian… Oh my God.”  


She couldn’t focus, everything around her was blurry and she felt like she was going to throw up.  


“Bianca…”  
“I don’t feel good…”  
“Jesus… Hey, there’s nothing to see here!” Gus said and Dela tried to wipe the paint with her sweater’s sleeve. “Go to your classes, there’s nothing here that is your business, go away!”  
_“So I guess that’s why her parents had to kick her out._ ”  
“ _How do you know that?”_  
“ _My mom goes to the same church, poor woman, having a dyke as your daughter is such an embarrassment, this is what she gets for choosing to be a lesbian._ ”  


Bianca couldn’t take it anymore.  


“That’s enough, Rebecca!” She shouted to the blond girl. “This is none of your fucking business, you don’t get to talk about something you don’t understand!”  
“I do understand, you brought the embarrassment to your family, you deserve this and more.” Rebecca screamed back to her, all of her friends laughed and pointed at Bianca.  
“Say that again, say that again you fucking bitch.”  
“You wanna fight, shorty?”  


Gus took Bianca’s arms and stopped her from hitting her while Raja stood in front of Rebecca.  


“It’s not worth it, Bianca.” He whispered to her.  
“She is an idiot, she doesn’t know what she is talking about!”  
“I know she is but fighting is not going to fix anything.”  
“Let me go!”  
“What is happening here?”  


When they heard Principal’s Rice voice approaching all of the teenagers ran, Rebecca and her minions included, leaving them alone in front of Bianca’s locker.  


“I asked you a question.”  
“Are you blind or what? Look at my locker!” Bianca said and pointed to it. “Look at what your stupid cheerleaders did!”  


Principal Rice touched the paint.  


“And it’s still fresh, someone must have done this just few minutes ago.”  
“Wow, big discovery, Sherlock.”  


He looked back at her.  


“I am not going to accept this kind of behavior from you, Miss del Rio.”  
“What?”  
“Go to my office, now.”  
“But she didn’t do anything!” Raja said. “Someone spray painted her locker and called her that, this isn’t her fault!”  
“You three go to your classes if you don’t want to have detention all week.” He said.  
“Go, I’ll be fine.” Bianca told them.  
“Bianca…”  
“I’ll be fine, Dela, just go.”  


She turned around and walked with Principal Rice to his office, she felt people’s eyes on her and heard people whispering all the way, this wasn’t good but it wasn’t new.  


“Take a sit.” He said and sat as well on his chair after closing the door. “Do you understand why I brought you here?”  
“No, if I’m being honest I don’t, I didn’t do anything.” She crossed her arms in front of her chest and gave him an angry look.  
“I know you didn’t.” He said. “Look, I already know what happened with your parents, this is a small town and news fly fast.”  
“Good to know.” Bianca said with the most sarcastic voice she could have used.  
“I’m not going to lie to you, things are not going to get better now, those kids don’t know how to react to something they are not used to.”  
“Then what am I supposed to do?”  
“We’ll help you to paint your locker and miss Glascock will have detention this week, I'm pretty sure she was the one to do that to your locker I just have to prove it.”  
“And me? What am I going to do?”  
“The only choice we have here for you is to move on.”  
“Move on?”  
“Yes, move on.”  
“But how I am supposed to move on? You saw what they did today, what Rebecca told me, I don’t think this is the only thing they’re going to do.”  
“What could they do to you, Miss del Rio?”  
“I… I don’t know, throw my things away, hit me, get my clothes away while I’m in the gym showers, those idiots are crazy.”  
“Move on, that’s what you have to do.” He said again.  
“Just move on, move on and don’t do anything if they try to hurt me, what a good fucking solution.” She took her backpack and opened the door.  
“Miss del Rio, wait.”  
“I don’t have to wait, sir.” She said. “You already gave me your answer, thanks a lot.”  


She slammed the door and ran to the auditorium, Bianca sat on the floor behind the curtains and threw her backpack away and she screamed, she screamed until her throat hurt and then punched the wall, she punched the wall until her knuckles were bleeding and felt how all the energy she had left was drained off her body.  


"Fucking." She looked at the mark of blood she left on the wall. "Stupid piece of shit!" And hit it again.  


She fell to the ground and held her wounded hand, she promised herself that she was not going to cry again and she was not going to do it, she refused to, she held back her tears and looked at the ceiling.  
She remembered something her dad had taught her to control her anger.  


_"Count to ten, little Bee, and when you're done do it again_."  
"One… two, three, four…"  
_“… And you’ll see, Miss Portendonfer, this auditorium is the perfect place where you can teach your drama classes.”_ Bianca heard a professor say, she hid behind a couple of boxes that were on the stage and looked at the door as it opened. “The stage is big and the backstage is even bigger for all the ‘behind the curtains’ stuff to happen, if you know what I mean.”  
“First of all; if you’re trying to flirt with me you won’t get further, I’m a lesbian.” She looked at the woman in disbelief from where she was hiding, she never heard someone to talk about their sexuality this open before, not in Louisiana. “And second I’ll be the judge of that, go back with Principal Rice, I want to have a minute to myself in this auditorium. Thank you.”  


She didn’t hear him say a thing, just a door closing and the woman laughing.  


“You can get out from your hiding spot, girl, it’s just the two of us now.”  


Bianca looked from behind the boxes at the woman, she must be around Mrs. Hides age, she had long and blonde hair and was wearing a short dress that made Bianca think she didn’t have that much of a fashion sense.  


"Come here, kid.” She said again. “Let’s have a kiki.”  
“A kiki?” She asked her as she took her backpack and joined her on the first row of seats.  
“That’s how we, homosexuals, say ‘have a talk’ in New York.” The woman had a high pitched voice and Bianca was not having it.  
“Good to know.”  


They sat in silence for a few seconds, she looked at Bianca.  


“I heard your talk with your shitty Principal.”  
“Yeah? Is that a habit of yours? Hearing other people's conversations or what?”  
“The kid is rude but not as much as me.” She said. “Back in New York I’m an insult comic, I could cut you if I wanted to.”  
“Then do it.”  
“I said if I wanted to and I don’t want to.” She said. “Even I know when it’s appropriate to give someone a read or make fun of them and you are not here for that.” She waited to see if she got a response from her but the only thing she got from Bianca was silence. “Look, kid, from what I heard you’ve been under some hard shit lately and it seems that Principal Pee is not doing anything to help you.”  
“He never does a shit for anyone besides the football team or the cheerleaders.” Bianca said.  
“And he leaves aside all the artsy kids?”  
Bianca nodded.  
“Ugh, I hate those idiots.” The woman said, she took a pack of cigarettes from her bra and lit up one. “Want one?”  
“No, thanks.” Bianca said and saw her taking a long drag of it. “You cannot smoke in here.”  
“You say it like I give a shit.” She put it back on her bra and looked at Bianca. “Look, I’m here to cover Mrs. Ongina while she's off and imma teach art, history and I’ll also run the Drama Club, if while I’m here you need help don’t doubt in coming to me, ok?”  
“How can I trust in someone I don’t even know?” Bianca asked her, the woman took a pair of tissues from her purse and pointed to her bleeding hand.  
“Sometimes people who are not your family can become more than that.” She said. “I heard from some girls that you are like me, that you like girls.”  
“And?” She saw how the professor stepped on her cigarette and walked to the door where the first aid kit was and took a couple gauzes and alcohol.  
“I know how hard is to be queer and live in a small town, that’s why I moved to New York.” She poured a little alcohol on the gauze and asked Bianca for her hand, she pressed the gauze on her knuckles and Bianca held back a curse. “New York is where everything started to change for us, the Queer.”  
“Then why are you here?” Bianca asked her while she put more gauzes on her hands and bandaged them.  
“I just came to cover my friend, they think I’m gonna stay here for good after Ongina comes back but after what I saw I’m not doing it, I have a better gig in New York.”  


Bianca looked at her and started wondering how she had arrived in the right moment.  


“While I'm here I'm going to take care of you.” She said. “But don’t tell anyone I'm being nice, I have a reputation to keep.” She offered Bianca her hand. “Bernadette Portendonfer but call me Bunny.”  
“Bianca del Rio, just call me Bianca.”  
“Alright, Bianca.” She got up and Bianca joined her. “Let’s go get some paint to fix your locker, let’s show those fuckers that they won’t be able to take down Hurricane Bianca.”


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You guys, here is chapter five!  
> Disclaimer, there is an insult here that I doubted a lot on adding it because it's about eating disorders, I don't ensure any of those behaviors, if you need help you can always ask for it, if you need someone to talk I can recommend you _7 cups_ in this app there is always someone who is going to hear you out.  
> Remember you're not alone.

"... So you're saying the new teacher is the one who helped you painting your locker?"  
"Yes." Bianca said and passed Raja the ball, they were on their gym class and were being careful Miss Michaels didn't catch them talking. "And said if I need any help I can go to her."  
"Bitch, that's awesome!" She jumped on her place with the ball on her hands. "You have a teacher that will cover your man back."  
"JAJA. So funny." Bianca caught the ball and threw it back to her friend.  
"Did you tell her about Rebecca and her minions?"  
"No."  
"Why not? She can help you with that."  


Raja was right, Rebecca and her friends had been harassing her since the incident of her locker, they would take her stuff, throw her food to the trashcan and even fill her locker with trash.  


"Yes, you're right but I don't want to depend on other people, I have to be fucking independent and if I start relying on other people…"  
"You'll get your heart broken?"  
"You say it way too dramatic, I was going to say hurt."  
"It's the same, bitch."  
"Besides, I can take care of myself."  
"HEY YOU TWO." Miss Michaels shouted from the middle of the gym. "Keep throwing the ball to each other or you'll have to enter the soccer game."  


Bianca rolled her eyes and caught the ball.  
"I just don't want that."  
"I think you may want, look behind you, queen bee is looking at you with that stupid smile of her."  


Bianca looked behind her and Raja was right, Rebecca was looking at her again with her minions around her whispering..  


"I don't even care anymore." She passed Raja the ball again. "The same bullshit as always."  
"I would think it twice.” Raja said. “You should tell her, you never know when you'll need a hand."  


Miss Michaels blew the whistle and both friends went to the showers, Bianca left her clothes on her locker and took a towel, she showered and put her hair in a ponytail, she put the towel around her body and went to her locker to get her clothes and found it wide open.  


"What the…" When she looked inside she noticed al of her stuff was gone, she looked around, over the lockers, down the benches and on the trashcans, her clothes and backpack were nowhere. "For God's sake!" Bianca heard laughing coming from the restroom, she followed the laughing and saw a couple of girls running out of the room, she looked into the toilet and found all of her clothes inside with her backpack and notebooks, on the tiles there was something written with red lipstick.  


_YOU BROUGHT THIS TO YOURSELF_  


"This… AHH!" She screamed at the top of her lungs, she hadn't done anything to those people, they were punishing her for just being different than them, they were making her feel like shit, they-  
_"Girl! It's Bun-bun, come out I brought you some clothes."_ Bianca held the tower around her and opened the door and saw her teacher with clothes on her right hand and Rebecca on her left hand who was trying to free herself from the professor.  
"Let me go, you old-"  
"Ah no, no, no." The professor said. "You're not going anywhere." She passed Bianca the clothes. "Get dressed, we're going to Principal's Rice office, come on."  


\----  


Both girls were sitting in front of the Principal's desk with Miss Portendorfer by Bianca's side with two plastic bags on her hands, she took one of the bags and poured it's content on the desk, Bianca looked at it surprised.  


"Look at this, Santino." Miss Portendorfer pointed at the stuff. "That's the spray paint that was used on Miss del Rio's locker to paint those insults a few weeks ago, the same exact color and I found it on Miss Glascock's locker and I also found this." She took a sweater, Bianca recognized it, it was hers. "It's Bianca's, she lost it a few days ago or should I say it got stolen by this girl, and this lipstick here was used to write a threat on the restroom tiles were all of Bianca's clothes and belongings were thrown into a toilet and it's the same color and shade Miss Thing here is wearing. What other prove do you want of your head cheerleader acting like an homophobic Christian white girl stereotype?" She looked at Rebecca. "This is harassment, this is abuse, are you aware of that?"  
"I didn’t do that, they just want to blame me! All of this is just a big coincidence."  


Principal Rice held the brick of his nose, he looked at the stuff and at the other plastic bag where all of Bianca's wet stuff was, he rested his back on his chair.  


"Are you even listening to what you're saying? This is a serious issue!"  
"Bernadette." Principal Rice looked at the professor. "How did you find all of this?"  
"Since I arrived I noticed how miss Glascock looks at my protege here and every time she gives her a particular look something happens to Bianca, the other day Rebecca kept looking at her the whole history class and then her locker was filled with garbage and today on their gym class it was the same and then this happened." She placed the bag full of her wet stuff in front of the Principal.  
"Rebecca." Principal Rice looked at her, he looked disappointed. "Do you understand what is going on? Why are you doing this?"  
"I didn't do anything!" The girls said and crossed her hands over her chest. "Miss Portendorfer just wants to blame me for this, I didn't do anything!"  
"Rebecca, I'm not the only one that has seen you, there are another two girls who told me about what you're doing, are they lying too?"  
"Yes!”  


The Principal took a long breath.  


"Ok, this is enough, I cannot let this pass, I've given you more than enough chances in the past but I cannot do it this time. What do you suggest, miss Bernadette?"  
"Well." She looked at Rebecca and smiled. "It's the football season coming right?"  
"Yes, the end of the season." Bianca said, Miss Portendorfer smiled at Bianca and looked back at the Principal.  
"Let her out of the cheerleaders team for what's rest of the season."  
"What!? You can't do that! She can't do that!" Rebecca yelled at the Principal, he raised his hand to shush her and looked at the professor.  
"Bernadette, its the end of the season, the team needs it's leader."  
"But you can't let her go like this, she is harassing a student that was just kicked out of her house and that is living by herself."  
"Ok, yes, I did it but she asked for it!" Rebecca yelled and looked at Bianca. "She asked for all of this when she decided to become a lesbian! I'm sure this disgusting dyke even dreams of kissing me and that turns her on, I'm who turned her into a lesbian, I know it, she wants me."  
"You wish! I don't like anorexic pigs that think the world rotates around them!"  
"That's quite enough!" Principal Rice shouted. "Both of you sit down, now!" Both girls did as they were told, the Principal took a long breath and looked at them. "Miss del Rio, I cannot give you detention, you didn't do anything wrong."  
"But she-"  
"Rebecca, I said it's enough." He told her and made her shut up. "But you, you've done more than enough, you just admitted it." He took a couple of papers from a drawer and a pen. "I don't like what I'm about to do but it's the only way you'll learn your lesson, Rebecca Glascock, you are dismissed from your role as head cheerleader and cheerleader in general, you cannot go back to the team until the season ends."  
"WHAT!? Are you out of your mind!?"  
"And you'll also have detention for the next two weeks with Mrs. Hides." He handed miss Portendorfer the sheets of paper and got up from his chair. "You can leave now."  


The teacher took the plastic bags and walked out of the office with Bianca by her side while Rebecca stayed back yelling at the Principal, they went to the auditorium, Bianca sat on the first row of seats and her teacher handed her a dark glass bottle.  


"It's root beer, girl."  


Bianca grabbed the bottle and took a long sip.  
"I told you I got your back, Bianca."  
"How did you know? The whole Rebecca shit?"  
"Your friends told me, the girl with the tattoos on her hands and the one with the tall boyfriend."  
"Raja and Dela."  
"Yes, them." She sat by her side on the row. "She said that you didn't want to say anything about it."  
"I wanted to fix it alone."  
"Well, you were doing a pretty shitty work on that, thank whoever it's up there I helped you." She punched her shoulder playfully. "We stopped queen bee so we stopped the hive, they will not bother you anymore."  


Bianca smiled, Raja was right, she needed her.  


"Thank you, miss Portendorfer, you're the shit."  
The professor burst into laughter and patted her back.  
"You're hilarious, kid!" She grabbed another bottle. "You've earn the right to call me Bunny, well done."  
"I think is more like "Bunion" no?"  


Bunny spit all of her root beer making Bianca laugh as well, both of them remained laughing for a while, Bunny wrapped her shoulders with her arm.  


"Huracan Bianca is unstoppable, I love it."  


Bianca let herself enjoy Bunny's embrace, she was warm and she was helping her and covering her, she felt safe with her.  


It was nice.  


\----  


Some days had passed since the showers incident and everything had gotten better for Bianca, the harassment had stopped, she could enjoy a whole meal without Rebecca throwing her food and the only stuff she had on her locker were her new books and notebooks that Rebecca had to buy her.  


Everyone in the school knew that Bunny had Bianca's back and that's how she liked it.  


She didn't had to work today so she walked straight to Dela's house, she finished her homework early and lay down on the floor with Marsh over her stomach, she felt good, it was nice having a quiet and peaceful time for her.  


She fell asleep like that.  


\----  


"Bianca, guess what!"  
"What?"  
"Come on! You gotta guess!"  
"I don't know, Raja, what?"  
"Osh, you're no fun."  
_"Let her alone, Raja, she's working."_ Danika said from the counter, Bianca gave Raja a mocking look and kept sewing the dress she had been working on.  
"Don't think you won, bitch." Raja cut a pattern on the red fabric her mom had given her. "Even you didn't guess I'm gonna tell you, there's a party I want to go."  
"Good for you.”  
“It’s on Timberlane, in two weeks.”  
“Timberlane? Bitch, what kind of party people can throw on Timberlane?” She took a pair of scissors and cut the string of thread.  
“Raja, _use kaam karane do.”_ Danika peeked through the door and gave a look to her daughter who only rolled her eyes.  
_“Theek hai maan!_ I’ll tell you when we’re at Dela’s”  


\----  


"Come on, Bianca, I tell you is gonna be fun!"  
“Sure thing, Raja.”  
“You haven’t even gone once! You cannot say that!”  
_"What is gonna be fun?"_ Dela asked them, she was entering the house on her boyfriend's arms, she had a bandage around her ankle.  
"What happened to you?" Bianca asked her and gave Marsh a carrot.  
"A sprained ankle." She said. "Nothing to worry about!"  
"Are you sure about that?" Gus asked her.  
"Yes, Gus now shush your mouth and I'll see you tomorrow." Gus helped her to sit on the couch and kissed her goodbye before he left. "But what were you talking about? Where do you want to convince her to go?"  
"To Timberlane!"  


Dela gave them a confused look.  


"Ehh Raja, why do you want to go there?" Dela asked her and rest her hurt ankle on the coffee table.  
“You see? She also thinks you’re crazy.”  
"Oh don't tell me you don't know!" She said. "Every year there's a big party for gay people on February in Timberlane, it's not near to June where the lesbian and gay manifestations happen so people don't catch them, we should go!"  


Dela looked surprised.  


"I've never heard of that before."  
"You're straight, that's why you don’t know but you've earn the right to know as an ally."  


Dela made Bianca a signal to join her on the couch, Bianca sat with her and Dela whispered on her ear.  


"She doesn't know that I used to date Shangie?"  
"I don't think she does."  
"You dated who!?" Raja jumped on the couch next to them. "Shangie? The exchange girl from Texas? Why I didn't know that?"  
"Because you were too busy inside the skirt of the girl from the Philippines."  
"Manila is hot, what can I say? Guilty as charged." Raja said, she sat next to Bianca and gave Dela a look. "We haven't finished talking about Shangie and you, Bianca Maria-"  
"That's not my name."  
"-have to come with me, you're gonna love it! Just imagine this; lots of queer people with the freedom of being who they are, boys kissing boys, girls kissing girls, girls being the girls they know they are and boys doing the same. It's beautiful!"  
"It does sound good, too good to believe it's a real thing and I don't want to spend my time on things that aren’t real." Bianca said and patted Dela's leg. "And even if I said yes, how would we get there? It's not like your mom is gonna lend you the car to go to a gay party in fucking Timberlane."  
"I know that and that's why I asked miss Portendorfer if she could take us!"  
"You did what?"  
"And she said yes!"  
"She said what!?"  
"Oh come on, Bea! It's gonna be fun!"  
"It does sound fun." Dela said with a curious look on her eyes.  
"Dela! You're supposed to tell Raja that shit is stupid and that we shouldn't do it not join her on her stupidity!" Bianca talked back to her friend who only laughed.  
"Bianca." Dela took her hands. "I'm gonna be honest with you, when was the last time you did something just with the objective of having a fun time?"  
"I… I don't remember."  
"And when was the last time you could live your truth without the fear of being harassed or hurt?"  
"... I've never done that."  
"You see what I mean? You need this, you need to start embracing who you are and I think that this road trip is exactly what you need." She squeezed her hands and felt Raja resting her head on her back and wrapping her arms around her. "So? Road trip or what?"  


Bianca smiled playfully.  


"Ok miss thing, road trip."  


\----  


"Don't worry, Mr. de la Creme, the girls will be under my watch all weekend, we'll just go to visit the city and take a look around." Bunny was sitting on the living room talking with Dela’s dad and Raja's parents, they were asking her tons of questions about the road trip, Dela was worried her dad would not let her go while Raja looked relaxed.  
It was funny, if she had wanted to make this trip there wouldn’t be a force powerful enough to convince her mom to let her go, her dad wouldn’t have a problem on letting her but her mom was a whole different story, she would start talking about the dangers of going out alone and how a young lady shouldn’t do those kind of things.  


Jokes on her, she was the one who kicked her out to the "dangerous" world alone.  


“Then it’s all settled!” Bunny clapped her hands getting Bianca out of her bubble of thoughts, she saw Bunny shaking hands with them, she looked at the girls and smiled. “Girlies, go to pack your stuff, I want you ready that Friday by 9AM in front of the school, we leave at nine thirty, got it?”  
“Go it, Bu… Miss Portendorfer.”  


She smiled and grabbed her purse from the couch.  


“I’m leaving now, girls, see you tomorrow on history class, byeeee!”  


Bunny left leaving all of them on the living room, Raja’s dad was the one to stop the silence.  


“Is she wearing a wig or that’s her real hair?”  
“I’m sure that’s a wig, love.”  
“That’s definitely a wig.”  


All of them nodded.  


\----  


_Two weeks later_  


“Need any help?” Bianca looked at her door and saw Dela standing leaving her backpack next to the stairs.  
“Not really, only closing it.” Dela got on her bed and sat on the suitcase, they heard a weird sound and Bianca immediately zipped it. “Uff, thanks for that.”  
“Anytime.” Bianca put the suitcase on the floor and joined her on the bed resting her feet on the wall. “You know we’re only going for a weekend, right? You don’t need a whole suitcase.”  
“I know but my mom… Adelaida always said that is better to prevent than regret.”  


Both friends were silent for a couple minutes, Bianca looked to her nightstand where her teddy bear was.  


“When we were down with Miss Dottie talking I saw that you were not really in the moment.” Dela said. “Something was bothering you?”  
“No, well, not like… Yes but not really, I was just thinking that if I had tried to do this road trip when I was still living with my parents there wouldn’t be a chance my mom would have let me go, she would start ranting about how risky making a road trip could be and that I’m not responsible enough and blah, blah, blah but now I didn’t have to ask permission to no one, I said I’m going and I’m actually going.”  
“And how does it feel?”  
“Not as good as I thought it would.  


Dela didn’t say anything for a minute, she just nodded.  


“Do you miss her? Your mom?” Dela turned to look at her.  


Bianca sighed and looked at the ceiling.  


“I do, a lot, we didn’t have the best of relationships mother-daughter but she’s still my mom.”  
“What do you miss from her?”  


Bianca thought it for a minute, what did she missed from her mom?  


“Everything, she is tough but in the inside she has a heart of gold.”  
“She reminds me of someone.” Dela poked her cheek.  
“I remember… One time on third grade there was a girl that was horrible with me, mom had enough and told me “Go and punch her on the face and if a teacher calls you out, tell them I told you to do so.” And I did it, I fought back and when I went back home with a huge bruise on my face and no bully she took me get ice cream.” She laughed but felt an emptiness on her heart. “Do you know what I’m gonna miss the most from her?”  
“What?”  
“Every year on our birthdays she bakes for us our favorite cake.”  
“What cake did she bake for you?”  
“Chocolate, chocolate with sprinkles.” Bianca smiled. “She also gave me the best gifts, she gave me dresses, make up, heels, last year she gave me my sewing machine... “  
“That’s why you were so upset when dad couldn’t find it.”  
“Yes, it was the last gift she gave me and now it’s gone… ” She felt the tears forming on her eyes and an emptiness on her stomach, a sob escaped her lips. “Sorry, I just…” Dela wrapped her arms around her and drew circles on her back.  
“It’s ok to cry, Bianca, it’s ok to feel like this and miss her.” She whispered in her ear. “You can cry, it’s ok, I’m with you.”  


Bianca held her friend and closed her eyes, she felt the tears roll down her face.  


“I just want the pain to end, Dela and I miss my mom, I miss her so bad and it hurts so bad to know she does not miss me, she just kicked me out not caring what would happen to me, she hadn’t called to see if I’m ok or even alive and I want to hate her for that, I want to hate her so bad but I can’t!”  
“Shh, it’s ok, it’s ok, I got you.”  


Both girls laid down, Bianca cried to sleep on her friend’s arms and Dela held her all the night long always reassuring her, Dela looked at Bianca, even on her sleep she looked so sad, she had bags under her eyes, it was obvious that she hadn’t had a good night of sleep since she started living with them, Bianca rested her head on her chest, it was obvious she was not going to be able to go to her room to sleep. Dela took Bianca’s blanket and covered the two of them.  


“I’m always going to be here for you, my friend.”  


And she fell asleep holding her friend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I promise next chapter is not going to be sad and Bianca will be happy... You know she is c:


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> YOOO here's chapter six for your nerves, I really liked writing this 😇 tell me what you think on your comments!  
> Remember you can find me in Tumblr as little bitty baby Potter or iadoreyoubabydoll 😘

It was saturday morning, today there was going to be a big sale on the high school he had attended, he got up at seven to take a shower, he waited for the water to be on the right temperature when he heard a knock on the bathroom's door.  


"Mijo, don't use all of the hot water, your brother didn't take a shower last night and I need him to shower today."  


He sighed.  
"Yes, ma'am."  
"You make him take a shower and your little sister to look presentable, got it?"  
"Got it, mom."  


After he was ready he went to his siblings' room, he saw her little sister was already ready and doing her hair.  


"Mom said you need to look decent."  
"And I told her that I heard her the first time." She left the hairbrush on the drawer and went out of the room, he went to his little brother's bed.  
"Hey, David, get up." He shook his little brother who only groaned. "Come on, you have to shower."  
"Let me aloneee." David said and covered her head with his pillow.  
"David, get up or I'm going to kick your ass."  


David took the pillow off from his face and gave him an angry look.  


"Like mom kicked Bianca out?'  


Tony didn't know what to do or how to respond to that, he looked away and got up from his bed.  


"Go take a shower, David."  
"Why are you always avoiding the subject? Why you don't want to tell me where she is?"  


Tony grabbed a pair of pants and a shirt from the closet and threw it to his brother's bed.  


"Get ready."  
"Why you don't want to talk about Bianca? Answer to me!"  
"We have shit to do, go get showered and dressed, I'm not gonna say it twice."  


Tony closed the door ignoring his brother yelling at him, he took a long breath and then another to stabilize himself.  


"This shit is harder than I thought."  
_"Bianca did it every year and she never complained."_ Tony looked up and saw Lucy carrying a sleepy Claudia on her arms. "You should have thought about it before, you know, you took her away from us."  
"Lucia, not this again."  
"Don't worry, when you leave for Cambridge I'll be the one doing this, you won't suffer for long."  


She walked down the stairs, Tony ran his hands on his face and rested his back on the wall, it was too much for him, how was Bianca able to do all of this every year?  
"She must have a super power or something… Yes, that must be."  


"Kids, the boxes!"  
"We're coming!"  


He helped his siblings to take every box with the stuff they were selling on his dad’s truck, he took another box from David and closed the door.  


"Is that all, Antwan?” His dad asked him from the driver’s seat.  
“No, there’s still one more box.”  
“Let David bring it and get in the car.”  
"Why me?" David asked his dad and gave his brother another look. "He's old enough to do stuff." "David." “No, dad, it’s ok and that box is heavy, I got it.”  


Tony went back inside the house and to his room to bring a box he had been hiding for weeks under his bed, he opened it to check everything was in order and carried it to his dad’s truck.  


"What’s on the box?” His little brother asked him.  
“Nothing important, Dave, just some old stuff.” His dad gave him a suspicious look but didn’t say a thing, they drove all the way through downtown and arrived to the school, it was early and no one was there yet, they were the first ones to arrive again.  
“Come on, boys, let’s get everything settled before your mom starts yelling at us.”  


They settled a couple of tables on the gym while his mom and sisters made some signs for the sale with the other girls, after a while his friends arrived and Tony convinced them to help him settling everything, he placed a table outside of the gym door and placed the most eye catching stuff.  


“Hey, Tony.” One of his friends called him.  
“What?”  
“Is not that your sister over there? Bianca?”  


Tony turned around and saw that Carlos was right, Bianca was there sitting under a tree with some people and a dog on her lap, he got a better glance of her face, even from the distance he could see that she didn't look good, she had bags under her eyes and her eyes were swollen and puffy, like she had been crying, her hair looked messy and she looked tired and sad, really sad.  


"Tony, come on, man, we gotta get this done.”  
“I’m coming.” He saw her getting on a car with two girls and an older lady who said goodbye to a guy who was now holding the dog's leash and drove down the avenue.  
"Tony?" Lucy touched his shoulder getting his attention. "What are you doing? Mom wants to know if you're done." She looked at the car. "Who's that?"  
"No one we care." He turned around and looked at his sister. "Let's finish this shit."  


He ignored the weird feeling on his stomach and walked behind his sister, he opened the box he had brought with him and placed an almost brand new sewing machine on the table for someone to buy it.  


\----  


"Hi ladies!" Raja said and took off her sunglasses, she left her backpack on the grass and sat next to Bianca. "Where's Bunny?"  
"She hasn't arrived." Bianca said to her friend.  
"She was the one who told us we had to be here early and she's the one who's late."  
"Maybe she thought we were not gonna listen to her and be late anyways." Dela said and gave Marsh a bite of her sandwich.  
"She must know you well." Dela's dad said with a fun smile.  
"I'm never late."  
"JAJA, yes you are." Bianca told.her friend and received an irritated look from her, they heard a claxon and saw Bunny driving with her head out of the window.  
" _Giiiirls!_ Are you ready for a good old road trip?" She got down from the car wearing sunglasses and the biggest hat Bianca had seen.  
"What's up with the ugly hat?"  
"How dare you? This is a very expensive hat I bought in New York years ago, it's called fashion, Yankx."  
"That doesn't change the fact it's ugly." Bunny pinched Bianca's stomach.  
"Fucking rude." She unlocked the doors. "Get it in the car, we don't have all day and put the seatbelts on, if you go flying out of the window is not my fault."  


They said goodbye to Dela's dad and left the school, Bianca looked through the window and saw the gym sale, she saw a guy and a little girl that looked like her siblings.  


"Shit…"  
"What happened? Did you forget something?" Dela asked her.  
"No, nothing, let's just go."  


\----  


After two hours of driving they arrived to Timberlane, Bunny parked on a small hotel next to a liquor store, they left the car and took their stuff from the trunk.  


"Ok, girls, I book two rooms for you just asked for the booked rooms for Bunny Portendorfer, one with a single bed and another one with two single beds, it's up for you to decide who gets each room." Bunny said as she got on her car again.  
"Where are you going? You're not coming with us to the party?"  
"Hell no! I'm a Stonewall girl, not Timberlane, I'll go to buy some shit, eat some food and then come back to sleep 'cause I'm old, you three have fun." 

She started her car and drove away, the girls took their stuff with them and followed the guy from the hotel to their rooms, Raja said she wanted the single room and Dela and Bianca were ok with sharing, they got in their rooms and unpacked their stuff, the room was not the best she had stayed in but definitely not the worst, Raja entered their room and Dela jumped to the bed and hugged the pillow.  


"What are you going to wear for the party?" Dela asked her.  
"I don't know, I brought some clothes-"  
"No shit!"  
"-but I don't know what to wear."  
"Let me see what you got." Raja said and unzipped her suitcase, she took her clothes piece by piece and gave a sigh.  
"What?"  
"This is grandma's clothes." Dela burst on laughter as Bianca looked at her friend clearly offended.  
"What!? This is not!"  
"Yes this is!" Bianca pulled out a knitted sweater and a skirt. "This is what you would wear to the church and where we're going is very far away from being a church."  
"I like them, they're cute." Dela said and took the sweater from Raja.  
"You don't count."  
"What do you suggest then?" Bianca asked her and Raja gave her a malicious smile.  
"You brought money?"  
"Duh."  
"Let's go the sale."  


\----  


Raja led her friend through the downtown until they arrived to a big house where a lady was sitting on a fluffy pink chair with a chihuahua on her lap, the yard was full of weird stuff that Raja told them she was selling.  


"You can find anything here, Miss Tammie has everything you can imagine." Raja told them.  
"Dead people too?" Bianca asked her as she saw the weird lady whispering something to the chihuahua's ear.  
"Don't ask her, I'm pretty sure she does." Raja whispered to them and turned to the woman. "Tammie!"  
She stopped talking to her dog and smiled to them.  
"Raja banana!" The woman got up from where she was sitting and left her dog on the pink chair, she was wearing what Bianca knew was a huipil, a mexican dress with bordado all around the neck, her eyebrows were really thick and she seemed like she was running just towards them, no, she was running towards them and stopped in front of Raja and point at her with her long finger. "Why haven't you come to see me?"  
"I'm here now, it doesn't count?"  
"You're not a number, Raja banana, you don't count." She looked at Bianca and Dela and gave them a big smile. "Hi there! My name is Tammie Brown with an I and an E and I am a high concept art character." She offered her hands to the girls and then hid them behind her back when they were going to shake them. "Ha! You were just pranked!" The woman started laughing and then stopped to look at them. "But the real question is who are you?'  
"I… My name is Delilah, Dela for short, Lila for my dad and Miss de la Creme if you're nasty."  
"Uuhh! That was good!" The woman clapped her hands and looked at Bianca. "And who are you, lady of the big bun in her hair?"  
"Bianca del Rio, the girl of the big bun in her hair."  


Tammie looked her directly into her eyes and gave two steps towards her.  


"Lady Bianca, you don't know who you are."  
"What?"  
"You don't know who you are, that's why you just repeated what I said about you." The woman placed two of her fingers on her forehead and looked right into Bianca's eyes. "You're a lost kid, aren't you?"  


Bianca didn't know how to respond, she looked at her friends, Dela seemed as confused as Bianca and Raja seemed curious about what Tammie was doing.  


"Miss Bianca, you are just like the girl that came by like an hour ago, I told her "you are very lost, you don't know how to go in life, you're scared, get rid of the fear and go at it!" She just looked at me like I am a crazy chihuahua woman, she paid for a blue shirt and ran away! Can you believe it!?"  
"I… No?"  
"That's right!" Tammie then placed another finger now on her neck. "Bianca panini, you need to find yourself and know who you are, don't be lost, find you and enjoy yourself, be yourself even when the world tells you that you're crazy be proud of being the chihuahua lady and scream to the world to excuse their mouth because we are pretty great." She retired her fingers and looked straight at her. "And so are you."  


All of them remained silent for a while, Tammie gave them a big smile and went back to her chair, she placed her dog on her lap and crossed her legs.  


"Feel free to look into my curiosities, maybe you will find yourself there, Bianca panini."  


The girls nodded and started looking through the stuff she was selling.  
"Guys, she is really… Different." Dela said as she showed Bianca an orange shirt.  
"I told you that Tammie is like that, I've known her for a couple years and she does that every time with someone that catches her attention." Raja said and shook her head at the orange shirt. "Nope, that shirt is awful."  
"What do you think about her, Bianca?"  
"She's crazy."  


They kept looking through the clothes, Bianca was not going to admit it to her friends but she had found what Tammie told her very true to herself, she was lost and she didn't know who she was, for 18 years she had been señora Adelaida's daughter, Tony's sister, Dante's daughter and now she was none of that, she was just Bianca.  


But who was Bianca?  
She didn't know.  


"This is perfect!" Raja's voice got Bianca out of her thoughts, she looked at her friend who had a pair of black jeans and a high heel pair of boots. "We just need to find a shirt that goes with this."  
"What about this one?" Dela showed them a leopard print blouse, Raja nodded.  
"It's perfect, are you down to wear this for the party, Bianca?"  


Bianca thought it for a minute, there was no way that her mom would have let her wear something like that before but now her mom was not there, she couldn't tell her what was wrong and what was right, not anymore.  


"Sure, why not?"  


The girls smiled and went to Tammie to pay for the clothes, she took a yellow box and put the clothes on it.  


"The very expensive leopard shirt I bought in Mexico, the jeans I stole from a store and the boots that I never wore, four dollars please." Bianca handed her a five and told her to keep the change. "Enjoy the party, girls! And remember if someone comes for you tell them that you don't see them walking kids in nature!"  


\----  


"Come on! Put on the boots, I wanna see you!" Raja and Dela sat on the bed waiting for Bianca to come out of the bathroom, Bianca sighed and opened the door.  
"So? What do you think?"  
"You look fucking hot!" Raja said and grabbed Dela's arm. "I'm sure you'll get laid tonight."  
"Raja!"  
"What? This party is where a lot of people get their cherry popped." She said and popped her tongue. "Maybe you'll find someone here that you like."  
"Stop talking, you're gross!" They went to the mirror and started doing their make-up, Bianca let Raja do her hair while Dela helped her with her make-up, when she looked at her reflection she didn't see herself, she looked different and she liked it, her eyes had black eyeshadow and her lips were red, Raja had done a high half ponytail, she looked good, she liked it.  
"What do you think?"  
"I look… Hot!"  
"I told you so!" Raja passed them their purses and grabbed two bottles of vodka from her backpack. "Ok, ladies, let's go the rainbow."  


\----  


The girls walked down an avenue and arrived to a big ballroom, there was a big guy on the door dressed in all black, he gave them a look.  


"Are you a friend of Dorothy?" He asked them with a very deep voice.  
"Were the tin man, the lion and the scarecrow." Raja immediately say, the man nodded and let them in.  
"What was that?"  
"Friends of Dorothy, it's a code." Raja explained them. "We use it to identify ourselves, if people don't answer correctly they can't get in." She opened a curtain for them. "Ladies, welcome to Oz."  


Bianca was amazed, the whole ballroom was decorated in colors, rainbow flags were covering the windows and there were a lot of people, there were girls kissing girl, boys kissing boys and drag queens and kings, she saw the queens walk around on their heels and their enormous wigs and some other explaining younger people how to walk on heels and the kings explaining girls how to act like a guy, music was blasting on the speakers and people were drinking everywhere.  


"What do you think?" Raja asked them.  
"It's…" Dela started to say.  
"Amazing." Bianca said. "Are they going to ask for our IDs if we want a drink?"  
"Nope, serve yourself."  


The three of them poured vodka on a glass and took each a shot, Raja burst on laughter at their faces after their first shot, a tall black drag queen smiled at the girls, she approached to them with a bottle on her hand.  


"First time here, kitty girls?" She asked them with a singing voice over the music.  
"Is that obvious?" Bianca asked her.  
"Oh girl, you look like a newborn Bambie and by the way you're looking around you also look like a kid in a candy store." She looked at her in awe . "Wanna have fun?"  
"I…"  
"Mom and dad are not here, kitty girl, enjoy yourself." 

She gave her a look. "And put on some red lipstick, everything is better with cherry big lips." And winked at her, Raja only patted her shoulders and dragged them to the dance floor.  


Music was blasting, Bianca started to feel dizzy, the alcohol was getting her but she didn't care, she was having fun, she grabbed Dela and Raja's hands and danced around with them as she accepted drinks and shots from strangers, she felt someone put their hand on her shoulder, when she turned around she saw a girl; her hair was blond and straightened, she was wearing blue eyeshadow with pink lipstick and a blue shirt, the girl grabbed her hands and placed them on her hips.  


_"Wanna dance, Bianquita?"_  


Bianca nodded and started dancing with the girl, she placed her hands on her waist while Bianca placed hers on her shoulders, the girl moved to the rythm of the song and led Bianca on their dancing.  


"You are amazing at dancing, Bianca." The girl said and roced Bianca's cheek with her lips.  
"That's bull-" Bianca frost on her feet, how did this girl know her name? She apparted from the girl and looked carefully at her. Pink lipstick, she heard Bunny's voice on her head; it's the same color and shade Miss Thing here is wearing. "Wait a sec… what the fuck!? Rebecca?"  


The girl put her finger on her lips shushing her, she grabbed her hand and took her with her to a garden that was on the back of the ballroom, there was a bench surrounded by roses, Rebecca offered her a seat but Bianca refused it.  


"Are you going to explain me what the fuck is going on?" Bianca asked her. "What the fuck happened? Why were you dancing with me? Why are you here?"  
"I'm pretty sure you know why I am here."  
"No, Rebecca, I don't know, why the fuck are you here!?"  
"Who attends these parties?"  
"Raja said that gay people, trans people and drag people… wait, are you…"  


Rebecca sat on the bench and passed her hand on the back of her head.  
"Yeah, gay, lesbian, whatever you want to call me."  


Bianca didn't know what to say, Rebecca Glasscock, the queen bee of her high school had just told her she was like her, what can you say to people on this kind of situations? She didn't know what to tell her but she did know what she wanted to ask her.  


"If you're like me then why have you been doing all those stupid things? Throwing away my food, filling my locker with trash, stealing my sweater?"  
"Do you want to know the truth?"  
"Yes I do!"  
"Because I like you."  


Bianca was caught off guard at what Rebecca said but didn't believe the girl.  
"Yeah, right, I'm drunk, Rebecca but not a pendeja." Bianca told her. "Do you really want me to believe that you've been harassing me just because you like me? Yeah, that sounds very logical."  
"I was not doing that because I liked you, I did take your sweater because of that but the other stuff I did was for other reason."  
"What reason, Rebecca? I don't think there's a valid reason to harass someone!"  
"It was because I was jealous and angry."  
"What?" Bianca looked at the girl, Rebecca crossed her arms on her chest and looked away from her. "Why would you be jealous of a girl that was kicked out for being gay?"  
"I am not supposed to be this, I am not allowed to like you and I am jealous because even you were kicked out but you are free to live your life as you want." Rebecca said and wiped her eyes. "I can't do that, if I did it I don't know what would happen to me."  
"That's-"  
"And I was so mad and jealous to see that even when you were kicked out you had support, Delilah took you into her home, tattoo girl got you a job and you have miss Portendorfer on your side, you are fucking privileged!"  
"I don't have privileges, Rebecca." She sat in the bench, three inches apart from her. "Every day is a struggle since I left my family, it hasn't been easy."  
"And then." Rebecca said ignoring what Bianca was saying. "I started to like you, last year and I felt gross, disgusted I was just…"  
"Punishing me because you liked me?"  
"I know it sounds stupid but in the moment it made sense to me." Rebecca said and looked at the floor. "And I was so jealous that you live your life as a gay girl."  
"That's where you're wrong." Bianca told her and looked at the sky. "Ever since I was kicked out I haven't given myself the chance to do it, this is the first time I do something 'gay' if you know what I mean." Rebecca gave a little laugh and looked at her. "I haven't kissed a girl, I haven't dated a girl or even go under the skirt of a girl, I am not Raja or Dela who do that with their partners, I just haven't gotten any opportunities to do so."  
"And what if we do it?"  
"What?"  


Rebecca placed her hand on top of hers and turned to see her.  


"Neither you or me have had something with a girl, let's try it here, now."  


She cupped Bianca's face with her free hand and kissed her, it was Bianca's first kiss, she didn't know what to do and as when they were dancing, she let Rebecca led her. Bianca had never kissed someone in her life and didn't understand why people was so obsessed with kissing but now that she was here kissing this girl she understood why, Rebecca's lips were amazing, she gave Bianca a little bite on her lip and Bianca got a weird feeling on her stomach.  


"Do you want me to stop?"  
"No." She said breathless. "Don't stop."  


Rebecca continued kissing Bianca, she encouraged her to open her mouth and let her inside, God, it was amazing, Bianca took her hand under Rebecca's shirt and drove it to her breasts.  
"Can I…"  
"Do whatever you want to me." Rebecca led her hand to her boob and under her bra, Bianca was not sure if she felt more drunk on alcohol or the feeling of being kissed. "Do you want to go further?"  


Bianca hesitated, she told her she had never been with a girl, she was not even sure what to do with her own body.  


"I…"  
"Don't worry, I'll show you."  


Rebecca took her hand and walked with her behind a bush of flowers, she took her shirt of and placed it on the floor for Bianca to lay down. "It's gonna be ok." She took Bianca's blouse off, next her own bra and then Bianca's. She kissed all of Bianca's chest and went on her boobs, Bianca felt Rebecca's tongue on her and it was amazing, she decided she wanted to make her feel good, she wanted to learn but not there.  


"Hey, can we go to my hotel room?" Bianca asked her, Rebecca rested her head on Bianca's stomach.  
"Why? Are you scared someone might see us?"  
"I actually am." She out on her blouse and helped Rebecca to put on hers, they got up and went inside the party, Bianca told her to wait while she went for the keys, she found her friends talking with the drag queen they had seen before. "Raja."  
"What?" Her friends looked at her surprised. "Biiiitch! You have all of your lipstick smeared all over your face!"  


Bianca rolled her eyes and took Raja's glass, she drank all it's content and looked at her.  


"Can you lend me your room?"  


Her friends and the drag queen looked at her and laughed.  


"Who would have thought this girl that looked so serious when she arrived was going to be the first one to leave with someone!" The drag queen said. "Come on, kitty girl, give her the keys."  


Raja laughed again and gave her the keys if her room.  
"Don't do anything I wouldn't!"  


Bianca nodded and left, she found Rebecca waiting for her in the door smoking a cigarette, she stepped on it and held Bianca's hand, they walked to Bianca's hotel and to Raja's room kissing each other, they took each other's clothes and laid down the bed.  


"Bianquita, the door."  


Bianca got up and put the "Don't disturb" sign on the door.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know, I know  
> I'm such a terrible fanficker, I left you two months without fanfic :(  
> I'm back in college and it's been hella difficult but I'm getting through it, one of my professors is still encouraging me to keep writing these fanfics and told me to not stop, he's cool TwT  
> Anyways, let's hope I can still post more and not make you wait this much again  
> enjoy the chapter and remember you can send me asks and talk with me in my tumblr https://iadoreyoubabydoll.tumblr.com/:3

“I tell you that Mrs. Davenport hates me! She didn’t even looked into my eyes when I was doing my presentation.” Raja said and closed her locker.  
“To be fair.” Bianca said as she opened hers. “She never looks anyone in the eyes."  
Dela punched Bianca with her hand, Bianca rolled her eyes and found a note pasted on her biology book.

_Meet me in the chemistry lab when classes end._  
_Rebe._

“What’s that?”  
“Nothing.”  
“Are you going to tell us who left you that note?” Dela asked her and tried to grab it.  
“Nope, it’s not important.”Bianca put Rebecca’s note with the others on a little box she had started to keep on her locker. “Let’s just go.”  
“Come on, you don’t tell us anything anymore.” Dela continued as Bianca closed her locker. “Why you don’t want to tell us?”  
“Because it’s nothing, end of the story, bye.”  
“Bianca come on.” Raja joined Dela on the asking, Bianca tightened her lips and looked at them.  
“I tell you that this note thing is nothing, stop making a big show about it, ok? Stop it, now.”  


Dela and Raja sighed and started walking away, Bianca followed her friends down the hall to their english class and smiled, she and Rebecca had been seeing each other almost every single day since they had came back from Timberlane, sometimes they would lock themselves on almost every empty classroom they would find, sometimes even on the janitor’s closet, nothing would stop them from spending at least a moment together, they hadn’t told anyone, not even their closest friends because no one had to know, their relationship or whatever they had was their own, it was none of other people’s business.  


Outside of their bubble they were still the Rebecca and Bianca everyone knew, they didn’t really talk or even look at each other but, if Bianca was being honest to herself, there were times she couldn’t help it and she would be caught looking at her, Rebecca would notice and immediately go into bitch more with her but Bianca didn't care.  


They had their secret.  


The bell rang, she took her stuff and left the classroom running, she had a date today.  


\----  


“Not again.”  
“Bianca, wait!”  


Raja and Dela saw their friend rushing out of the classroom and not waiting for them, Raja rolled her eyes and left the classroom with Dela, when they arrived to their lockers Bianca was again running away down the hall.  


"Where are you going? Bianca!" Dela called her friend but she didn't turned around, she just left.  
_“Girls._ ” The two of them turned around to see Bunny standing behind them with a bunch of exams on her hands. “What’s up with Bianca? She’s running all around the school and everywhere she goes.”  
“We don’t really know.” Raja said, she opened her locker and placed her books inside. “She’s been like this since we went to the party.”  
“She’s been like this since February?” Bunny asked them, Dela helped with some of the exams. “She’s been like this for two months?”  
“Yes, two months.” Raja reaffirmed and closed her locker.  
“She hasn’t tell you anything?” They followed her to her new office Director Rice had given her since Miss Ongina had came back, they put the exams on her desk and sat down.  
“Nope.” Dela said. “I’ve been asking her and she just tells me that she is ok, that I don’t need to worry and that I should mind my business.”  
“When I asked her she told me to mind my shit and when I insisted again she told me to go fuck myself, the usual Bianca.”  


Bunny shook her head, she took off her heels and put on a pair of sandals she kept on one of her drawers.  


“She is hiding something from us and everytime we ask her is the same! _‘Not now. I’m busy. Later. I told you I’m fine.’_ And I’m starting to feel tired of this.” Dela said. “I feel like we’re losing her, like… Our friend doesn’t trust us anymore.” Her voice broke and a few tears could be seen on her eyes.  
“Hey, don’t cry.” Raja wrapped her arm around her. “Don’t cry, please because I’m gonna get mad and I’m going to punch her on her tit.”  
“Wait, wait, no one has to get her titty hurt!"  
“Now that I remember.” Raja said. “Someone left her a note, on her locker, today.”  
“What? A note? Like a post it?”  
“Yes.”  
“Did you get to read it?”  
“No, she hid it on a little box before I could.”  


Bunny nodded.  


“What number is her locker?”  
“283.”  


Bunny opened the drawer where she kept her sandals and pulled out a bunch of keys, she took one and gave it to Raja.  


“I’m gettin’ worried, try to find out what she’s hiding, don’t forget to be careful.” Bunny said. “We don’t know what must be going on in her mind and if she does not want to tell us them we are finding out." Raja took the key and shared a look with Dela.  
"She's gonna be really mad at us if she finds out we did this." Dela said and took the key.  
"Well, then do it carefully, don't let her catch you." Bunny said and rested her back on her chair. "If you got away with stealing the alcohol from your parents and didn't get caught then you can do this." She looked outside of the window.  
"Let's go, Raja."  


\----  


Bianca stretched her arms and grabbed her bra from the floor of the laboratory.  


“What are you doing?” Rebecca asked her and wrapped her arm around her waist.  
“Putting on my bra.”  
“I like you better without it.”  
“Ew, move away.”  


Bianca got up from the floor and put on her bra, she looked at her reflection on the window and saw her breasts covered in hickeys and a small one on her neck.  


“Rebecca, I told you I didn’t want hickeys.”  
“Why not? They look good on you.”  
“And they’re difficult to cover up.”  
“Are you trying to cover up what we have?” Rebecca asked her from where she was sitting.  
“Is not that what we always do?”  
“Touché.”  


Bianca put on her pants and shirt, she grabbed her backpack and put on her shoes.  


“Where are you going, Bianquita?”  
“To work, I already missed one day and I don’t want Danika to regret hiring me.”  
“She won’t get mad if you miss one day more.” Rebecca placed her hands on Bianca’s hips and got them inside her pants. “Call in sick and let’s do it again.”  
“No, Rebe.” She got her hands out of her pants. “I need to go to work, I have to pay the rent to Dela’s dad and keep saving money for college, remember I don’t have rich parents that care about me, I gotta pay it myself.”  
“Bianca, come on! Stay.”  
“Rebecca, I can’t.” Bianca walked to the door. “I’ll see you tomorrow, ok?”  
"Bianquitaaa, come on!"  
"I start in 20 minutes, I'll see you tomorrow." She started walking towards the door when Rebecca's voice stopped her.  
“Do you love me?”  


There was a long silence between the two of them, Rebecca was naked sitting on the mess of her clothes that were on the floor and looking at her without blinking, Bianca already had her hand on the doorknob and the question caught her off guard.  


Did she love Rebecca?  


How could she tell if she loved her?  


She didn't know how she could tell if she loved someone and she definitely didn't know if she loved her. How was she supposed to answer that question?  


“You don’t need to answer to me in words but you can do it with actions.” Rebecca got up and walked to her and held her free hand. “Stay with me and let’s do it again, that will be enough for me, but if you go.” She let go of her hand. “It’s enough for me to understand that you don’t love me. We'll stop with this thing that we have, I'll never bother you anymore because I'll know that you don't want anything with me anymore."  


Rebecca walked back to the mess of her clothes, Bianca started to get nervous, what should she do? She needed to go to work but she really wanted to stay too, if she left she would have her job but lose Rebecca and would be alone again.  


What to do?  
What to do?  
What to do?  


She closed the door.  


\----  


Bianca ran to Dela’s house and sat on the stairs before going in, she recovered her breath and stayed there for a while, she had been with Rebecca all afternoon and she felt her legs shaking and all of her body sore, she shook her hands and legs and opened the door carefully trying not to wake anyone up, it was past midnight and she knew that by that time everyone in the house was already asleep, she climbed the stairs and saw the door of her room opened.  


“What the…”  


She went inside her room very quietly and heard some voices.  


“Have you found anything?”  
“Not yet, wait this-”  
“What the hell are you doing in my room!?”  


Raja and Dela jumped at the sound of her voice, Marsh was with them and wiggled his tail at the view of Bianca.  


“Not now, Marsh.” Bianca put her backpack on her bed and looked at the mess that was on the floor, they had taken out all of her clothes and books, everything was on the floor and it was a mess. “What the fuck is wrong with you? What are you doing?”  
“We thought you were not sleeping here tonight." Dela said. "You know, like all the other nights."  
"That's none of your business, what I want to know is why are you in my room and doing this mess!"  
“That’s not for you to ask when actually this is my house, not yours.” Dela told her with the angriest voice they had ever heard her talk. “And we're here because we’ve been asking you for weeks what is going on with you and you don’t tell us anything so we came here to look for answers.”  
“What? I don’t know what you mean.”  
“Oh, you don’t know?” Dela asked her with a sarcastic tone. “Since the party you’ve been all weird, you just run away and disappear for hours, you don’t even come here to sleep, you are hiding stuff from us.”  
“Dela, calm down.” Raja placed a box on the floor and reached for her friend.  
“No, I’m not calming down.” Dela yelled. “We are supposed to be your best friends, we don’t keep secrets from each other, and yet here you are hiding us stuff.”  
“Dela…”  
“You’re fucking Rebecca, aren’t you?”  


Dela yelled at her and threw her little box to the floor, all the notes she kept hiding on her locker were all over the floor.  


“How did you get this? Did you…” Bianca looked at her friends and saw Raja with a key on her pocket. “You forced my locker, your forced my fucking locker.”  
“I didn’t force you locker, I just opened it with the key that is on the teachers’ room.” Raja said. “And we wouldn’t have been on the need to do this shit if you had been honest with us! Why the fuck are you doing this?”  
“I didn’t say I was fucking Rebecca!”  
“But you didn’t deny it.” Dela talked back. “I just… Ahh!” She rested her back on the wall and slipped down to the floor, Marsh went to her and started licking her face, Bianca could see tears rolling down her friend’s face.  
“Dela…”  
"We tell you everything, Bianca, everything! I told you about my mom's passing, I told you about Shangie and I told you about Gus! Raja told you about Manila, about the problems with her dad and here you are not telling us this shit!"  
"That's not fucking fair, Delilah! You were the first fucking person I went to when my mom kicked me out! You were the first person I opened up about how much I missed my family!" Bianca yelled back at her friends, she could feel her voice breaking but she was not going to give her the pleasure of seeing her crying, she wouldn't show her that she had the power to make her feel like shit. "I just wanted to have a fucking secret, secret for once in my fucking life!”  
“I know that, I just… AHH! I just don't understand!” Dela said, Raja sat down next to her and held her hand. “She just-she made you feel like shit for years! And even more now that you’re out to the world, she even threw all of your stuff in a toilet. Why in the hell are you seeing her!? I don’t understand!”  
“I-”  
“And we are here just helping you in everything we can so you don’t get hurt and then you go inside the wolf’s mouth and fuck the girl we’ve been trying to get away from you, I don’t get it!”  
“Dela.” Raja interrupted her friend. “You will never get it if you don’t let her speak.”  


Dela sniffed and nodded, Bianca sat down on the floor in front of them, she took of her scarf and her shoes.  


“It’s complicated.” She started. “Rebecca is… Like me, like Raja.” Both girls looked at her surprised.  
“What do you mean?” Raja asked. “Does… She likes girls too?”  
“She does.” Bianca said. “And she has liked me, for a long time.”  
“But… But if she liked you why was she being a bitch with you?” Raja asked her.  


Bianca rubbed her hand on her nape and sighed.  


“It’s complicated.”  
“It must be a good reason for you to forgive her and have sex with her.” Dela said and looked at the hickey Bianca had on her neck.  
“Stop looking at it, I don’t like it.” Bianca put on the scarf again. “Well… Rebecca, she…”  
“Why do you cover it?"  
“Dela, stop.” Raja interrupted her. “Let her talk, if you don’t let her you’re never going to understand!”  


Dela wiped her tears and crossed her arms, Bianca rubbed her hands on the hickey that she had on her neck and continued.  


“Rebecca said that she hated me because I made her feel things that she shouldn’t feel, that she got nervous every time that she saw me and that she felt things she had never felt anytime she saw me, that it was nothing like what she had felt with a guy.”  


Dela rolled her eyes while Raja was silent listening to her.  


“Then why was she mean with you?”  
“I’m going to that part.” Bianca said. “She knew that it was wrong to feel that way, that she is supposed to fall in love with a guy and marry and have beautiful kids and that she has to be a good wife, and seeing me made her feel like she didn’t want that, that she wanted to be with me and it got her angry; she couldn’t feel those things, she had to stop and she thought that if she was mean and a bitch to me, the feeling would stop.”  
“But it didn’t stop.” Dela said and looked at Bianca.  
“No, it didn’t.”  
“She was the girl you ran off with in the party.” Raja realized, Dela looked at Raja with her wide open mouth. “Wasn’t she?”  
“It was her, she was in the party and Tammie also talked with her, that’s why she took the decision to finally make a move.”  


Both of her friends were shocked, the two of them were silent looking at the floor, not moving. Marsh had slept on Dela’s lap and was snoring directly on Dela’s hand.  
“Wow… That was…”  
“Unexpected.” Dela finished Raja’s sentence.  
“Imagine for me.” Bianca said, she took off the scarf again and hugged her knees. “I guess I owe you an apology for how I’ve been these last months but I need you to understand that this was a secret, I knew that in the moment you found out about my relationship with Rebe you would get really mad.”  
“No shit.”  
“-but I didn’t tell you because it was my shit and I wanted to remain private ‘cause I knew that shit would hit the fan and well… it did.”  


Raja held the brick of her nose and Dela took a long breath.  


_"Girls._ " Dela's dad slightly opened the door. "I don't want to interrupt any of your girl talks but is almost one in the morning and you have school tomorrow." He looked at Raja. "Are you staying over?"  
"If you're ok with that, if not I can drive home."  
"No, it's dangerous for a young lady to go out at this hours. Feel free to spend the night."  
"Thank you." Dela's dad closed the door again. "Dela, can I sleep with you?"  
"Sure." Both girls got up and returned Bianca's stuff to the closet and the drawers, Bianca just looked at them while they cleaned their mess, Raja offered her a hand to get up and 

Bianca accepted it.  


"Thanks."  
"We'll talk later." Raja and Dela went out of the room and closed the door, Marsh stayed with her and climbed to her bed.  


Bianca shook her head and put on her pajamas, she got in the bed with the dog and patted his head.  


"I fucked it up really bad, didn't I?" Marsh licked her fingers and wiggled his tail. "Gosh, sometimes I wish I was a dog too."  


Bianca kept looking at the ceiling for a while but she couldn't sleep, she put on her sandals and a sweater and went out to the front porch, she sat down and looked around, she saw two guys smoking and by the smell she knew those were not cigarettes, there was also Magnolia sitting in the top of a tree outside of her house.  


_“Can’t sleep?”_  


Bianca looked behind her back and saw Dela standing in there with a blanket around her shoulders.  


“No, neither can you?”  
“Nope.” She said. “Do you mind if I join you?”  


Bianca shook her head and Dela sat next to her and offered her the blanket as well, Bianca nodded and got closer to her friend with the blanket around the two of them.  


They remained silent for a while looking at the sky, there were not stars, only clouds and it was colder than usually.  


“I think I owe you an apology, Bea.” Dela was the first one to end the silence, she looked down to the floor. “I was an asshole back there.”  
“It’s ok, you don’t have to apologize.”  
“No, I have to.” Dela said. “I have to understand that it’s your life to live, not mine, that if you decide that you want to be with Rebecca I have to accept it, even though I don’t like her, not even a little bit.”  


Bianca smiled and nodded.  


“Are you happy with her?” Dela asked her. “Like, happy, happy?”  
“I don’t know. I’m not sad, that’s the important part, I think.”  
“Do you love her?”  
“Not this fucking question again.” Bianca rested her elbows on her knees and pressed her hands on her eyes.  
“What? Why? Again?”  
“Rebecca asked me if I love her today.”  
“Oh… What did you tell her?”  
“I didn’t tell her a thing, I don’t know if I love her.” Bianca said and looked at her friend. “How did you know that you love Gus?”  
“Well, it was… I don’t know, weird.” Dela said with a smile all over her face. “At the beginning he was too dumb, he would do some stupid stuff like walking on his hands and talk in weird voices and that would make me laugh a lot and then, everytime he eats ice-cream he gets it all over his face and I always clean him up, I learned to love those little things step by step, it’s not from one day to the next one.”  
“Did he ever make you do something you didn’t want?”  
“Never, there has to be a level of mutual respect, if your partner doesn’t hear you when you tell them no, there’s something wrong.” Dela was silent for a moment and then looked at her. “Has Rebecca made you do something you didn’t want to do?”  
“What? No!”  
“Are you sure?”  
“Yes.” Her hand went to the hickey on her neck. “Never.”  


Dela didn’t seem convinced, she got up and Bianca joined her.  


“I believe you, now let’s go to sleep, we have to tell Bunny tomorrow about you, she was really worried.”  
“She’s gonna whip my ass.”  
“She’s not gonna whip your ass.”  


\----  


“I’M GONNA FUCKING WHIP YOUR ASS.”  


Bunny threw her stuff on her desk and looked at her.  


“Raja and Dela, out. Bianca, you stay.” She took the microphone on the desk as her friends gave her a look and closed the office’s door. _“Rebecca Glasscock, report yourself to miss Portendorfer’s office in this moment.”_ She turned it off and looked at her again. “Don’t even talk.”  


They waited for a few minutes until Rebecca entered the office, she went pale at the view of Bianca sitting in front of Bunny’s desk.  


“Miss Dottie.”  
“Portendorfer for you, Rebecca. Sit down.” Rebecca did as Bunny told her, Bunny sat on her seat and looked at them. “I guess you know that the reason you two are here is because you’re in serious problems.”  
“Are we?”  
“Yes, you are.” She said, she opened her drawer and grabbed a plastic bag with underwear, Bianca knew it was theirs. “Care to explain why did you leave this on the yard, the chemistry lab and the history classroom?”  
“It-it’s not ours, I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Rebecca’s hands started to shake and Bianca could see sweat on her forehead.  
“Oh, believe me, I know what I’m talking about.” Bunny said. “Look, this meeting is not for me to intimidate you, I know that you two had been seeing each other outside and inside the school, don’t try to hide it, I know.”  
Rebecca looked at Bianca alarmed, Bianca held her knee down the table and mouthed an “its ok” but Rebecca tossed her hand away.  
“I just want you to be careful if this is what you’re gonna do and don’t pay less attention or focus on your other activities just to be with each other, Bianca has to go to work and you have to go to your church, I don’t want to hear from anyone that you’ve been missing your classes or activities, did you hear me?”  


Both girls nodded, Rebecca was still pale and nervous.  
“And keep your underwear to yourselves, please, I don’t want more unexpected surprises, ok?”  
“Ok.”  
“Perfect, you can leave, Rebecca. Bianca, I need you to stay a little bit longer.”  


Rebecca nodded, she grabbed the plastic bag and went out of the office, Bianca looked at Bunny.  


“Is this really what you want? To be with her?”  
“I… I guess so.”  


Bunny sighed, she looked directly to her.  


“I don’t want to tell you that I told you so if something goes wrong.”  
“Nothing is going to happen, Buns.”  
“That’s what you think, I know Rebecca’s type, if something goes wrong they’re not going to go down with us, they are going to save themselves, not others.” Bunny held her temples. “Be careful, for God’s sake, I don’t want anything bad happening to you.”  
“Everything is going to be ok, Buns.” Bianca reassured her again. “You just have to worry about your menopause and not eating whatever shit we have on the cafeteria and you’ll survive your old lady days.”  
“I’m not even 32 so shut up or I’ll call immigration!”  


Bianca burst in laughter and saw Bunny finally not angry, she Bunny opening her drawer looking for something.  


“Please tell me you’re not looking for your stinky sandals.”  
“I’m already wearing them, dumb.” She placed some pamphlets in front of her. “We have to talk about your future,since you’re not studying to become a pastor anymore I thought you would like to find another thing to do.” Bianca looked at the pamphlets.  
“Are those all in New York?” Bunny nodded. “Why?”  
“Bianca, I don’t think your place is here.” Bunny said. “This town is still to close minded for you, you need to go a place where we are free to be ourselves and where you can finally be free to do whatever you want and that place is New York.”  
“The greatest city in the world?”  
“The greatest city in the world.” Bunny pointed at the pamphlets. “You can attend the AMDA like me or the Queens or Brooklyn college, whatever you prefer.”  
“I don’t know, Buns, leave my city, my people… Leaving all behind?”  
“I know it sounds crazy but believe me when I tell you that sometimes leaving is the best for us, you’ll find better opportunities there as an actress or better.” She handed Bianca her sketchbook. “As a designer.”  


Bianca smiled, she took the pamphlets and the sketchbook in her backpack.  
“I’m gonna think about it and I’ll let you know.”  
“Better be before the semester ends, after your graduation ends I’m going back to New York and I wouldn’t mind giving you a ride if you decide you want to come with me.”  


Bianca nodded and left the office, she went to her locker where her friends were waiting for her.  


“How did it go? Is she going to kill you?” Raja asked her.  
“Nope, she actually wants to take me with her to New York.” Bianca handed them the pamphlets Bunny had given her.”She wants me study there.”  
“Bitch, that’s swell!” Raja said and read the NYU pamphlet while Dela read the one of Queens college. “Are you going, aren’t you?”  
“Hey, she just told me like two minutes ago, I haven’t made up my mind.” She opened her locker. “I have to think about it.”  


Bianca opened her backpack to put inside her math book when she found a post-it inside the door.

_you and me in the dressing room in gymnastics, no one will be there_

“It’s Rebecca’s?” Dela asked her.  
“Yes, it’s hers.” Bianca took her book and the pamphlets inside the locker.  
“What did Bunny told you?” Raja asked her.  
“She just told us to be careful, she doesn’t want us to get caught or something.”  
“Well duh, no one wants that.” Raja wrapped her arm around her shoulders and Dela held her arm. “Now let’s go eat something, I’m starving.”  


\----  


Bianca waited until everyone was in the gym and miss Michaels closed the door, she went inside and turned on the lights.  


“Rebe? Are you here?”  
“I’m here, Bianquita.” Bianca placed her backpack in the top of the lockers and walked to the showers, Rebecca was there sitting on the benches. “What happened with Portendorfer? What did she tell you after I left?”  
“Nothing important, she just told me to be careful, that we can’t get caught ‘cause something bad could happen.”  


Rebecca nodded, she got up and pushed Bianca to sit down on the bench.  


“What are you doing?”  
“I’m punishing you.”  
“What? Why?”  
“You’ve been a bad girl, Bianquita, someone knows about us and we were supposed to be a secret.” Rebecca grabbed her by her hair. “But don’t worry, you’re gonna like this.”  


Rebecca started kissing her and licking her face, she went down her neck where she knew Bianca liked to be kissed and left another hickey right next to the last one.  


“Take off my shirt, Bianca.” Bianca did what Rebecca told her, she took off Rebecca’s shirt and her hands went immediately to her breasts. “No, no, you can see but not touching.”  
“Come on, just a little bit.”  
“Hmm… Ok, just a little bit.”  


Bianca got her hands inside her bra and started massaging her breast, she could feel her skin and how Rebecca’s breath was getting quicker, Rebecca got her hands inside Bianca’s shirt as well.  


“Do you want me to…”  
_“Rebecca girl, come here now!”_ They didn’t have enough time when the door was burst opened and one of the most obnoxious minion of Rebecca entered the bathroom. “Rebecca come on, what… What the fuck is going on here!?”  
“Silky, help me!” Rebecca jumped to her minion’s arms. “She tried to turned me into one of them, into a lesbian!”  
“What!? What the fuck!?” Bianca got up and walked to her but Silky was faster.  
“No ma’am, you know I'm a church lady and as one I know your type, you’re not getting away with this, now you better leave before I call everyone to fucking kick your ass for touching my good christian friend here!”  


Bianca ran away from the bathroom, she grabbed her backpack and gave a last look at Rebecca, she saw her mouthing something to her while Silky was hugging her and brushing her hair with her hands.  


_“I’m sorry.”_  


Bianca pressed her lips in a line and mouthed something in return.  


_“Fuck you.”_

And left running with the eyes of everyone fit on her as cried her way out of the gym.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Y'all! I have a new chapter for all of you, this a key point for this story, I think that we have two more chapters to start talking about baby Adore -w-  
> For now, I really hope you like this chapter  
> You can find me in Tumblr as iadoreyoubabydoll or LITTLE BITTY BABY POTTER

_Dyke_  
_Dyke_  
_Dyke_  


_"Bianca? Bianca! What's wrong?_ "  


_I know your type_  


_"Bianca, where are you going?"_  


_I'm sorry_  


_"Miss del Río, go back to your classes. You can't go outside the school, where are you going? Miss del Río!"_  


Bianca ran pass Principal Rice and went out of the school, she didn't hear the horn of one of the cars when she ran across the street and all the way down the avenue, she couldn't focus on where she was going, she just wanted to escape from there.  


She needed to be gone.  


Bianca kept running for what it felt like an eternity until her legs failed her and she fell to the cold ground hurting her knees and hands in the process, she looked at the floor and tried to recover her breath.  


"It's ok, it's ok, I'm ok."  


_I'm sorry_  
_Dyke_  
_I know your type_  


"I'm ok, breathe, I have to breathe." Her breathing was fast, air was going in and out, in and out, in and out; she couldn’t focus, her vision was going blurry and she started to feel very nervous and terrified. “No, I’m not going to-”  


It was sudden when nausea hit her, she ran towards a tree and threw up next to it, she hadn’t eaten since last night, she was not even sure what she was throwing up but she was doing it, she felt her body contracting with every wave of fear and every breath she took.  


She held herself on the tree and walked a few steps before falling to the ground again, she wiped her mouth clean and looked around to where she was, it was a park and there was no one around, she was alone and for the first time she was grateful for that, she didn’t want anyone to see her like this.  


She walked to the swings and got on one, she left her stuff on the ground and looked at the sky.  


_I'm sorry_  
_Dyke_  
_I know your type_  


This time she couldn’t stop it, Silky had seen them and Rebecca had made it look like it was all on her, like she was trying to force her to have sex.  


A shiver roamed all her body, she didn’t do that, Rebecca had always agreed to do whatever she wanted…  


No.  


Bianca was the one who had ever agreed to do what Rebecca wanted, she had always done what Rebecca told her, not even what she asked but what she told her to do.  
S

he was not the one to blame, she hadn’t done anything bad.  


Right?  


Bianca took a long breath and kicked a little rock that was on the ground, she did have done something wrong, she had trusted on Rebecca even when people had warned her about her, she hadn’t listened and now she had to pay the consequences. This was happening to her because she had been so naive, so stupid to believe her, to believe someone could really love her.  


_You’ll never find love being a butch, Bianca, a lesbian is not supposed to find love. You have to find a man or you’ll never be happy._  


“No, you’re wrong, mom.” Bianca whispered to herself. “I can be happy by myself, I don’t need no one, I’ll be alone.” She reached for her backpack and took the pamphlets Bunny had given her. “I don’t need you, I don't need this fucking town and I don’t need her.”  


She heard a car pulling over, she looked up and saw her friends getting out of Bunny’s car, Bunny was behind them, Raja was the first one to reach her and wrapped her arms around her, then Dela’s and Bunny petted her head.  


“Bitch, we were so worried, are you ok?” Raja asked her and held her hands. “Bianca, your hands are bleeding.”  
“I’m ok, let go off my hands.”  
“No, you’re bleeding.” Dela handed Raja a water bottle and a bandage, Raja bandaged her hands and grabbed her backpack. “Better?”  


Bianca shrugged her shoulders.  


“You’ll feel better after a cup of coffee.” Bunny said and took her keys. “I’ll give you a ride home.”  
“School day is not over.”  
“I can give you a pass for the day, remember who you are talking to.” Bunny said as they walked towards her car. “Now get in the car, come on.”  


The three girls got in with Bunny, Dela sitting in the front with her and Raja sat in the back with Bianca, she never stopped holding her hand and caressing her palm until they arrived, Dela opened the door for them and went to the kitchen with Bunny to prepare the coffee for all of them while Raja and Bianca sat on the living room.  


“Raja, stop holding my hand.”  
“Sorry.”  
“It’s just weird.”  
“You’ve never thought before that is weird.”  
“I know but I’m not feeling well to do this corny shit.”  


Raja pressed her lips in a tight line but agreed, she let go of her hand and sat in another couch, Dela and Bunny handed them a cup of coffee each and sat along, there was an uncomfortable silence that Bunny ended.  


“Ok, something happened after you left and you’re not gonna like it.”  
“What was it, Buns?”  
“Silvia or Silky, whatever you call her, made a scene.” Bunny said and placed her cup on the coffee table. “We had to stop her, but she had already made a lot of noise about what happened on the bathroom.”  


Bianca gulped and nodded to her.  


“Everyone thinks that you tried to abuse Rebecca.”  


Bianca felt like she was going to throw up again but the vomit just wouldn’t go up her throat, she didn’t have anything else on her stomach for her to throw up, she just rested her back on the couch and tried to digest what Bunny had told her.  


Everyone thinks that she tried to abuse her.  


“Fucking hell.” Bianca whispered and let her cup on the floor.  
“I told her that she is not the person to make those statements since she was not in the room where it happened, only you and Rebecca so she couldn’t speak about something she was not sure of.”  
“But?”  
“Rebecca said that you did try to abuse her.”  


Bianca froze on her spot, she felt her hands going cold and started to feel dizzy, she tried to get up but fell on the try.  


“Bianca, wait!”  
“I don’t feel so good, I…”  
“Bianca!”  


\----  


Bianca didn’t know where she was, she couldn’t move, she tried to open her eyes but the lights were too bright for her.  


_“She is going to be ok, miss Portendorfer, she collapsed because of stress.” She heard someone who she was not sure who it was. “Has she been under circumstances of extreme stress?”_  
_“Yes, college choosing, and you know that high school can be hell, especially for someone like her.”_  
_“Well, she will have to rest for the day.” She heard the woman from before say. “She needs to drink a lot of liquids and have soft meals, no meat, no spicy food and no food with a lot of condiments. I want her to just rest and lay in bed for the rest of the week, then she’ll be ready to go back to school.”_  
_“Got it, doctor.”_  
_“Miss Portendorfer, I know that they’re almost finished with their school year but if I were you, I’ll consider transfer my daughter from that school, just think about it, we know that your daughter has enough problems there.”_  


She didn’t hear Bunny’s response, only the door closing.  


_“Are you awake, Bianca?”_  


Bianca nodded and covered her head with the blankets.  


“Can you turn off the lights?”  
“Sure.” Bianca saw through the blanket how the lights went off, she uncovered her head and saw Bunny sitting next to her on the bed. “How are you feeling?”  
“Like shit.”  
“Honest, I like it.” Bunny handed her an apple, Bianca took it gave it a bite.  
“Come on.”  
“What?”  
“Say it. ‘I told you that Rebecca was a bitch and she was not good for you, I told you so’ Say it so you get it out of your system.”  
“Even though I’m dying to say it, I’m not gonna do that.”  
“Why?”  
“I told you before that even a hateful old lady like me knows when to joke about someone, and you.” Bunny pointed at her. “Are not in the best moment to do that.”  
“How considerate.”  
“I know, right?” She handed her a water bottle. “But we do have to talk.”  
“Well, then talk.”  
“Things in the school haven’t been the best, after you left Silvia started to rant all over the school about how you tried to abuse Rebecca and since that girl is from the church everyone was believing in what she was saying.” Bianca swallowed the apple and looked at Bunny. “It’s not good.”  
“Fuck.”  
“Fuck indeed.” She said. “I talked with Santino, Silvia has detention for the rest of the school year for spreading rumors and Rebecca and I had a talk.” Bianca gave her a look and Bunny gave her a sad smile. “It wasn’t a happy talk, the thing is that we got into an agreement; no one is allowed to talk about the incident and Rebecca will deny all of whatever shit people is talking.”  
“What about me?”  
“We once said that Hurricane Bianca is strong and it will not be taken down by little drizzles like Silvia and Rebecca, did we talk about it or not?”  
“We did.”  
“So.” She continued. “Today you don’t have to go to school and you have the rest of the week so you can recover from the stress collapse that you had yesterday, on Monday you’ll go and you’ll hold your head up high and you’re not feeling down by whatever shit those idiots say, ok?”  
“Ok.”  
“I want to hear it with more enthusiasm.”  
“I’m not feeling down by whatever shit those idiots say.”  
“That’s the spirit!” Bunny said and punched her back playfully. “I gotta go, I have to grade some boring fieldwork reports, I’ll see you tomorrow.”  
“Buns, before you leave.”  
“Yes?”  


Bianca reached for her backpack that was on the ground and took the pamphlets.  


“How would it be if I decide to move to New York and study there?”  


\----  


On Monday Raja was already outside waiting for them when Bianca opened the door, she walked out with Dela holding her hand and saw that Gus was with Raja in the passenger seat, they got in the back and listened to Gus talk about how school had been, it seemed that what Bunny said was true; no one was allow to talk about the incident and when they arrived to the school the first person they saw was Rebecca and she was kissing a guy near to the door.  
Bianca felt all of her being stop and freeze at the sight of her kissing that jock, what the fuck was wrong with her? Why was she kissing that idiot?  


“I forgot to tell you.” Gus said. “Rebecca got a boyfriend, I guess she did it so everyone would forget about what happened.”  
“Bea?” She heard Dela call her name. “Are you ok? Do you want to go back home?”  
Bianca shook her head.  
“I’m fine.”  


They walked inside the school avoiding Rebecca and the jock, they arrived to the lockers and Bianca found hers without anything weird, she opened and this time she didn’t find a note inside, nostalgia hit her but she didn’t want her friends to notice.  


“Let’s just go.”  


Classes were as usual, boring, the professors were excited since they were near to their graduations and they wanted to do a big party to celebrate, Bianca didn’t care, she was not going, she just looked away and thought about her talk with Bunny; she took the pamphlets from her backpack and looked at the one that had caught her attention the most.  


_Parsons The New School for Design_  


“I don’t have to stay here when this is waiting for me in New York.” Bianca whispered to herself, she put away the pamphlet and smiled to herself, this will be the start of something new.  


\----  


“What do you wanna eat?” Raja asked her as she grabbed a tray and passed Bianca one.  
“I don’t know, what are they serving today?”  
“Rice, beans, apple slices, yogurt and milk.” Gus told them as he grabbed a bowl of rice for him and one for Dela. “Oh, and beef.”  
“That’s all?”  
“At least thank us you have food.” The lady behind the counter said and handed her a plate with beans, Bianca rolled her eyes and took the bowl.  
“I want this shit to be over.” She said, Gus and Dela walked away with their trays to a free table.  
“Two more months, Bea.” Raja said and took her tray. “Then we’ll be free to do whatever we want.”  


Raja joined Gus and Dela while Bianca finished grabbing her food.  


“I’ll fucking leave for good.”  


She grabbed her tray and went to join her friends, while she was walking she felt how someone grabbed her blouse and dragged her from behind, she fell to the ground and hit her face with the tray, all the food was over her and around her.  


She heard a lot of laughing around, she got up and saw Rebecca’s minions laughing with Silky.  


“That was a good one, wasn’t it?” Silky asked Rebecca, Rebecca smiled and nodded. “What are you looking at, Bianquita? I made you a favor, you look good with the beans, _frijolera!”_  


Bianca wiped the food from her face and approached to Rebecca, she tried to avoid her and looked at her minions.  


“You’re no going to do something?”  
“Why should I?” Rebecca told her without looking at her.  
“You know why.”  
_“No ma’am, we know what you’re trying to do and that ain’t working here.”_ Silky said from Rebecca’s back. _“Leave for good!”_  


Bianca felt anger taking over her but remembered what Bunny had told her, she took a long breath and looked at Rebecca.  


“Say hi to your jock for me.”  


She turned around ready to leave when she heard Rebecca’s voice.  


_“Whatever, dyke!”_  


She heard people gasping around them and some of them whispering, she turned around again to face her, her hands forming fists.  


“What did you just call me?”  
“I call you dy-“  


Rebecca didn’t get to finish what she was saying, Bianca hit her all across her face and made her tumble, Rebecca touched her lip and saw blood on her fingers, she looked at Bianca and threw her whole body to her making her fall, Rebecca started hitting her and pulling her hair, people were gathering around them howling.  
Bianca tried to cover her face from Rebecca’s punches, she hit her back and made her fall, Bianca was the one on top now grabbing her from her hair.  


“Didn’t you say you liked when I pulled your hair like this?” Bianca asked her and pulled her hair again. “Didn’t you say you like it!?”  
_“Girls, stop!”_  
_“Bianca!”_  


Bianca felt how someone grabbed her shoulders and dragged her away from Rebecca.  


“Let me go!”  
“This does not help, Bianca!” It was Raja, she was the one dragging her away while Silky was comforting Rebecca.  
“Raja, let me fucking go!”  
“What is going on in here?” Mrs. Davenport entered the cafeteria, all the people that had gathered around them ran and left them alone. “Care to explain what in the hell happened here?”  
“Bianca attacked Rebecca, look at her, she’s crazy!” Silky immediately said.  
“She started, she called me dyke!”  
“We don’t have time for your lesbian problems, Bianca, you have to leave!”  
“Silence, both of you.” The professor said. “Miss Gemini?”  
“Someone made Bianca fell when she was walking, then Silky started to make fun of it and Rebecca insulted Bianca, they were teasing her and when Bianca fought back, everything went out of control and-”  
“Enough, the four of you.”  
“What?”  
“Let’s go to the Principal Rice’s office, now.”  


\----  


Principal Rice gave a frustrated sigh and handed each of them a document.  
“

All of you will be suspended for the rest of the week.”  
“What? The four of us?” Silky asked him, Raja shared a worried look with Bianca.  
“But Raja didn’t do anything, professor.” Bianca said interrupting Silky. “She just pulled me away from Rebecca.”  
“I already made a decision.” He said and signed the sheets of paper where it said they were suspended. “I’ll send this to your parents to inform them about your suspension.”  
“Ha, good luck with that, you tell them hi for me?” Bianca said and rested her back on the chair, Principal Rice shook his head and passed the reports to his secretary.  
“You will have to wait for your parents outside of my office, as for you, Miss del Rio.” Bianca gave him a defiant look. “Miss Portendorfer will take you home.”  
“But right after this week we have the Spring Break, how are we supposed to deliver our homework and reports?” Rebecca asked him.  
“You solve that yourself, now go outside of my office to wait for your parents.”  


The four girls went outside, Raja and Bianca sat together away from Silky and Rebecca, Bianca was angry but at the same time she was really ashamed, she had let her emotions control her and that caused Raja to get into trouble as well.  


Raja was not talking, she was just looking at her hands in silence, Bianca looked at her friend’s hands as well.  


“Do you want to get them permanent tattooed?” She asked her.  
“I do, my dad doesn’t want to though.” Raja said and showed her hand to Bianca. “It looks like if I copied Silky and used a sharpie on my hands.”  


Bianca laughed and held her hand.  


“It does.” She said. “Just promise me to never use sharpie on your brows, you’ll look like a chola from LA.”  
“What if you get married with a chola? She’ll do your brows with sharpie too.”  
“No! I’ll never do that, the fuck is wrong with you?”  


The two friends laughed together, Bianca rested her head on Raja’s shoulder.  


“I didn’t want to get you into this mess.” She admitted to Raja. “I feel like my life is always led to shit, I don’t get a thing right.”  
“People who have shitty starts are led to have nice stuff in the future.”  
“Who said that?”  
“My mom but with wiser words, that’s what I understood.” Raja said and squeezed her hand. “You don’t have to be sorry for what happened, I’m not mad, I will always have your man back.”  
“You’re the worst.”  
“I love you too, friend.”  


They saw Silky’s mom in the door, she didn’t look happy at all, Silky swallowed hard when she saw her mother, she grabbed her stuff and followed her mother without saying a word.  


Danika was the next one, she said hi to Bianca and talked angrily to Raja in a language Bianca didn’t really understand yet, Raja left with her mom and told her she had to go to work that day.  


Rebecca and Bianca were left alone with the secretary, but she didn’t seem to care a lot about them, she was called to the Principal’s office and when she went inside they heard the door clicked closed.  


They remained silent for a couple of minutes until Rebecca spoke.  


“I’m sorry.”  


_I’m sorry._  


“Hm-mmm.” Bianca murmured and grabbed a book from her backpack; Lord of the flies.  
“I’m really sorry.”  
“…”  
“Bianquita, I’m sorr-“  
“Stop saying you’re sorry, you’re stressing me out.” Bianca finally said. “Don’t say sorry when you don’t mean it.”  
“I mean it.”  
“You don’t.”  


Silence reigned again between the two girls, Rebecca was the first one to talk again.  


“Bianca, please talk to me.”  
“I don’t want to talk with you.”  
“You are already talking to me.”  
“Good, you got what you wanted, like you always do. Are you happy now?” Bianca put her book down and looked at her, she wished she hadn’t done that, Rebecca had tears on her eyes and that made Bianca feel horrible. “Don’t, don’t do that, I’m not falling for this again.”  
“I’m not playing games, Bianquita.”  
“You are! You always do this shit!” Bianca yelled to her. “When something does not goes your way, you always do that stupid face and you expect for everything to be better but this does not work anymore!”  
“Bianqui-“  
“And don’t fucking call me Bianquita, you don’t have the right!” Bianca yelled again and looked away to her book. “Let me alone.”  
“Bianquita…”  
“Bianca!” Bianca looked at the door and saw Bunny entering with a bunch of reports and exams on her hands. “What happened in the cafeteria?”  
“Rebecca happened, Buns.” She grabbed her stuff from the ground. “Can we go?”  
“Sure, let’s get going.”  


Bianca followed Bunny out but before they were outside, Bianca turned around to look at Rebecca.  
“Don’t fucking talk to me ever again, enjoy your jock.”  
“Bianca…”  


She slammed the door closed.  


\----  


_Two months later_  


Their graduation ceremony had been nice, Bianca had made all of her friends dresses and she had helped Gus with his suit, they took a lot of photos that she’ll develop later, she taped closed the last box with her stuff and carried it outside to the trunk of Bunny’s car.  


“Is this the last one?” Bunny asked her.  
“It is the last one, Buns.” Bianca said and closed the door, she heard Gus’ car pulling over, Dela and Gus went out of the car and Gus handed her two 20 bills.  
“They gave us this for your mattress, they said it was a good one.”  
“Thank you, Gus.”  


Raja joined them with another box.  


“What’s this?” Bianca asked her.  
“Some fabrics my mom thought you would like.” Raja said and placed the box on the backseat. “She said you’ll need it.”  
“And she’s pretty much right.” Bunny said. “We have to get going, I’ll give you some time to say your goodbyes.”  


Bunny walked away with Gus, the three friends looked at each other.  


“I guess this is a goodbye.” Bianca said.  
“Not a goodbye, just a see you later.” Dela said, she grabbed her hands and Raja’s. “We are always going to be here for you, Bea.”  
“Even if you don’t want, I like to fuck around.” Raja said and smiled, Bianca could see that it was a sad smile, she grabbed her friend’s arm and squeezed it.  
“I know you do… Don’t tell anyone but I’m actually gonna miss you, guys.”  
“Awee Bea!”  


The three girls hugged each other, Bianca felt the loving arms of her friends around her and she hugged them back even stronger.  


After a couple of minutes they stopped hugging, they heard a barking and saw Gus approaching to them with Marsh.  


“Baby!” Bianca kneeled and let the dog lick her face and hair. “You didn’t think I was going to leave without saying goodbye to you? You’re the goodest boy ever.” Marsh barked and rested his paws on her legs. “You are a good boy, a handsome boy and a cute boy, I’m going to miss you a lot.  


When she got up she saw Dela sniffing, her friend hugged her again and let some of her tears come out.  


“Please call us when you get there.”  
“I will.”  
“Call us every day.”  
“Every day?”  
“ Well, maybe not every day but call, don’t be a stranger.”  
“I won’t.”  


They shared a last hug, Dela kissed her cheek and Raja pinched her nose, Bianca got inside Bunny’s car and saw her friends waving goodbye from the outside.  


Bunny started the car and Bianca saw her friends becoming little silhouettes until she couldn’t see them anymore.  


“Are we feeling ok, Hurricane?”  
“I’m not.” Bianca said, she put her seatbelt on and looked at the outside of her window. “I’m going to miss them, I really am.”  
“I know the feeling but think about all the possibilities, you’ll have a wonderful new start and you never know, I have the feeling your friendship with those two is strong, is not going to break because of a thousand miles.”  


Bianca smiled and nodded.  


“And besides.” Bunny handed Bianca her favorite pamphlet. “Parsons is waiting for Hurricane Bianca to hit it.”  


Bianca laughed, Bunny was right, not everything in life was bad and she was sure that New York was all that she’ll ever need.  


Nothing more than the greatest city in the world and her.


End file.
